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fluffydeoxys · 23 hours ago

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oh, one thing i can more easily relay right now: I made changes to this.

A slightly more detailed delving into each section (excluding the last image cus that has remained unchanged, although with the new addition that Hank only has its right eye, while Zero has their left eye) is under the cut. I've written a lot, feel free to ask something about it if you like

looking up at you meekly. uh. i wrote a lot so. if you were perhaps interested I would love if you read even a little. your time and interest is always appreciated!

TRICKY AND ZERO

As we know, Hofnarr was a big fan of Slaughter Time, and canonically speaking, the Arena Player has also directly participated in at least a single episode of it (though the level implies more than one at least). Simple right? Hofnarr would've seen Zero on TV, nothing more. But here's the thing with Zero... she's an anomaly, a paradox, something not terribly congruous with reality. Not even factoring in her abnormal, deleterious existence, there are twelve possible Zero (the Origins/Imprints, if you're curious) at any given moment during that Loop, so how could anything stable or normal hope to represent that entropy, that unknown possibility?

There's an episode of Slaughter Time that never aired. Maybe doesn't even exist. It's an online rumour at this point. A tape where, if you tried playing it, nothing comes out. Your screen turns black, or if you're lucky, you'll get some nonsense binary spat back out. But 'cus Hofnarr's such a big fan of Slaughter Time, he's gotta get his hands on this one. Eventually he did, but unfortunately... it didn't play anything.

Much later, when the dissonance tore Hofnarr apart and remade him into Tricky, he still had that tape, and sometimes clown likes to watch them. But this time, that mystery tape? It played something for him. Not much, heavily warped and unstable, stuttering and droning, changing with every pause, play and rewind, but he could see it. Something fighting like he'd never seen it before, a black shape that, while censored, he knew what it was: a grunt.

To this day, only Tricky has ever seen the contents of that Slaughter Time tape - the only recording of Zero from the loop. There was no name included in the tape, so Tricky calls her Death-bringer because of how efficiently she fought and, well, slaughtered. While he had no idea what weapon she was using, it looked most like a scythe. The Reaper.

When it comes to Zero though, she doesn't know who Tricky is, understandably. But what she DOES know, what she can see, is how strange his S3LF is. It's like I said before, his S3LF has been ripped apart and remade, using dissonance as the stitches. There are echoes of memories tied to a new face, a S3LF entangled with something peculiar, an entropic jitter that defies expectation. He is like if you took the memory of a person and reforged it anew. A fascinating anomaly for Zero, that's for sure, especially with how Tricky also does not... conform to reality, but he does so very... differently. His power is a lot more unstable and erratic. Dangerous. Thankfully, Tricky seems to have some idea that his own entropy would not play nicely with hers, should her power come to bear.

JEB AND ZERO

So what if I told you I think about these two a lot? They're weird, in a way that's very different to Hank and Doc. It's pretty messy and I'm kinda bad at making shit messy, so this is pretty fun to me. Grunt who hates so bad it makes him look like he wants her. Okay buddy.

So it used to be that Jeb hated her so bad that he wanted her dead, which he still does, but to the point he challenges her to a duel and he loses, resulting in that stomach scar (completing the nice little Jeb->Hank->Zero trifecta). He still has that, but the original context of it has changed completely 'cus I didn't like this at all.

With the help of some friend involvement, it has since changed to a flexible series of events: Jeb's first meeting with Zero was alongside Doc, which already set things off on a bad foot. Doc already pisses him off, but another lackey? Like Hank? Wonderful, what a fantastic day for him. Yeah the mysterious silent enormous grunt towering behind you won't piss me the fuck off. I already got one on my plate right now.

Jeb already expresses extreme contempt towards the Employers, distinctly about how they 'don't belong here' (quoting the post-credits scene in MPN: CHRISTOFF: You are not welcome in Nevada. State your business and go.). So when Jeb finds out about her more anomalous properties (the particulars I haven't decided on, but I'm sure he'd spot her fighting once or twice and.. learn some things)... It's another tally on the "why I don't like Zero" board. Then again when he sees her with Hank, it worsens. It FINALLY cements when Jeb ends up having a conversation with Zero.

Why?

Because Zero is quite polite. She's nice. Nice. Is this a joke? This formality? This kindness? (Mind you, it's just her not oozing insults like everyone else and merely tipping her hat after their short tête-à-tête was done) From a thing like you, knowing who you work with, how you end up covered in blood and viscera, holding yourself with this otherworldly aura? Fuck you. You think you're above me. I see you for what you really are. Even the fact she's ALSO taller than him pisses him off.

But it reaches its true boiling point when Jeb gets himself killed, as he does (possibly one of his in-canon deaths), and Doc is responsible for bringing him back. Like he often is.

And who does he have help when doing that? Yes, that's right, it's Zero. Zero helps 2BD retrieve targets from the Other Place, especially high-value ones, or ones that have been lost to the dangerous, less stable depths. Jeb factors into both, so Zero has to chase him down. And for Zero to successfully reclaim a person, she must "kill" them (which looks and feels like literal death), but it's so Zero may 'absorb' their S3LF and connect with Doc's tools to reinstate their S3LF with the body on Doc's end.

Thus: Zero chasing after a very angry and baffled Jeb throughout the Other Place. Zero most likely making a monotone comment about how difficult he's making it while Jeb barks back for her to maybe stop trying to kill him, you detestable lunatic!

All in all, a more reasonable situation for their "duel", and for why and how Jeb gets his stomach scar.

Putting that particular.. backstory? Aside, more generally speaking: Jeb has a lot of mixed feelings about Zero,

She is smart. She's a lot kinder than others, even if that kindness isn't overt, it's subtle, it's... quiet, I guess. She's not doing anything to or for him that she wouldn't otherwise; mostly she's just listening. He loves to talk. But I don't think many listen.

But he thinks it's some weird mind game or something. Because killing his problems is what he's used to, he thinks the problem is her, and the solution is that he needs to run her through with his blade. Hence the lovely little comment he has about her on the chart. I don't deserve this, I don't need it, I want you (gone). This is ludicrous. Why do you listen to me? Have you not seen my destruction, a necessary evil, but one that haunts me nonetheless? Where is your contempt?

... I feel small. I hate it.

Zero also has a lot of mixed feelings for Jeb, though in her own way that she can't quite articulate. It's a mix of detached pity, an acknowledgement of what happened, yet not quite comprehending the totality of emotion, for better or for worse. A strange hum of fondness, because in a way, he's quite.. funny. It's like finding humour in a surly, prickly cat who craves affection, but only in very specific ways. Oh yes, you hate me, and yet you're here again? She thinks, but it's never heard. And the lamentation that he truly is doomed. I'm sorry.

When Jeb gets killed in MC8 and is abandoned out in Somewhere, Zero later comes to his body. To send him off, so to speak. When he was gone, she just knew.

This was discussed with my friend devicecontact, but there's a particular scene I like a lot. Of Zero walking to his corpse while vultures circle overhead, forming a dark halo above, framing the red sun. As Zero kneels down to him and takes a scrap of his coat, her hand briefly flashes with red light. The absorption, or at least.. its implied, that maybe, a piece of his dying essence now lives within her.

The vultures spiral away, and Jeb is truly, finally gone. When Zero walks off, without a word uttered save the pause before she departs, she casts a long, lonely shadow across the wasteland.

To convey how strange their relationship is, I made Zero's text+arrow to Jeb a little odd. Zero makes a light joke, which she normally doesn't do, and states something objectively wrong (Jeb is not at all Doc's friend). So she remains obtuse about what she truly feels about Jeb. There's no way she could concisely convey a singular feeling or idea about him anyway. There's just too much, and the same could be said for Jeb to Zero, and he merely oversimplifies it as a notion to kill.

Oh. Zero's seen an old memory of his. Accident with the halo. Jeb doesn't like to talk about it. Because he's dead haha ! okay obviously more to it than that smiles with gritted teeth

whys this one the longest good lord. no I don't think about zerojeb. hey .hey

VICTOR AND ZERO

One of my favourite topics: the narrative. Or the deliberate lack thereof in this case! The narrative that cannot be, the story that cannot be told, the events that cannot be seen. Both as individuals and together.

Victor's story cannot and will not be told; the lens will always be turned away from it, and they will always remain unknown, unseen. All that will be seen is a name and a facade. Why? We truly may never know, for the Maker is nothing if not persistent in ensuring things go PRECISELY the way it needs to. Maybe Victor knows something, as he's aware of the fact that he cannot be known, and is perpetually followed by things on the border of reality.

Zero instead cannot be known. Ink stains spill on pages, gaps bleed out on memories, and corruptions erase all data. All that will be known are approximations, stories, tales, indirect points that can form a great web. The shape of her can be traced by those who know what to look for, but the picture will never be clear. It will slip. It will fade.

And if the two met? You'd never know. You can't know.

SOME THINGS CANNOT HAPPEN.

Why? Would it break reality as we know it? Would some vehicle of storytelling break altogether, inviting a new form of entropy? A devastation that would crack the shell, and the three planes would intersect, obliterating Nevada like nothing was ever there?

Or does the Maker want to prevent something from happening? Is it the Machine's intervention? The Auditor's commentary? Who is saying that text? What does that eye mean?

That vagueness, the censorship, it's REALLY fun to me. It's one of my favourite concepts for Zero, and naturally it also extends to Victor, but it's in a different.. medium. But there are very substantial consequences and ideas within the notion of a Narrative. Regardless, the ambiguity between them is far more compelling than knowing for sure whether or not they've met. Maybe they have... and what would that mean, and what would that look like? It's up to you, really. But one thing fis or certain:

The Maker does not want it to happen, no matter what.

GONNE AND ZERO

Right so. Little bit of a preface ramble for some context. In my headcanon, there are three planes of 'tangible' existence. Reality, obviously, where things happen, the "occurrant". Entropy, which can be considered the Other Place and any extensions of that, and the infinite possibility. And then Something Else, akin to the Nowhere, including it and yet not, the infinite stretch of behind the veil, around the sphere. There's something even beyond that, further than anything anyone can truly see or know, and that's where Fate and Else reside, but that's beside the point.

What the point is: there are gaps between these. When you are severed from the weave, no longer within the manifold of the Machine's reach, the narrative that enfolds the world, you sort of end up between... reality and entropy, sometimes slipping into Something Else with no real rhyme or reason. For the sake of stability, or perhaps the universe rejecting you, or the Machine just really doesn't want your ass gallivanting around.

Pointing being ... again, Gonne is still "out there." Existing, just.. not in a way almost anyone can reach, see, or even know about. Ostensibly, they're gone (heh).

But Zero? She can. She has.

In the back of her mind, somewhere far off, something taps at the wall. Something sky-blue, a colour quite rare, glimmers in a minuscule crack on an invisible wall. Zero notices.

Zero managed to put a "name" to a "face" when she 'bumps into' the S3LF-eater story. Zero always seems to show up when "interesting" things happen, which is the case here, and it was spurred by Zero noticing Hank had died (a cosmic gut feeling, more or less). She arrives after San and Dei have already hauled its body back.

Instead, she encounters Jeb and Sheriff, and they do the whole running-around of sorting out the S3LF-eater stuff. That's where Zero properly learns about Gonne, putting together those scraps of documents, of leftover logs. Now she knows who that 'voice' is.

What they've spoken about is unclear, because the means of conversation aren't expected or translatable, hence the abstractions and binary their text has to take. A new script, one that can cross the boundary of reality and entropy, but it doesn't convey ideas that can be clearly read or understood. But there are some recognisable shapes. And Zero is one of them. This shouldn't be possible.

There's a place beyond heaven and I saw it. Something might happen soon.

It's just a matter of time.

CRACKPOT AND ZERO

You know I used to not really think anything about Crackpot haha! That sure has changed! i haven't even seen them in game yet pleasehelpme

Crackpot is corroded with madness enough to know more than he should in vague, broken pieces about Zero. He also does other things in general, but specifically we're talking about Zero here, so. To others, it sounds like delusional ramblings - but like Zero says, Madness is just knowing Something Else. There is truth in what he says, and because there is truth, the words themselves unravel into shapes, approximations of ideas. For their truth has made even the words themselves "mad." To try and retain stability, to make sure things that cannot be known remain unknown, they unfurl and blur, blotch and blacken, until there is nothing discernible left.

But Crackpot speaks in such strange riddles that the shapes of what they have said DO mean something. Primarily, the 0s going up allude to how Zero is "something above", perhaps higher than the Maker, than this world itself. Not in power, but mere existence, her role, the end. There's also a rough shape of Zero in there, plus some imagery of her wings, a figure 8 loop, something piercing the veil of reality, and the two bound shapes of Hank and Zero.

Crackpot knows fleeting shrapnels, glimpses of Zero in a way that Doc has been striving towards for decades, albeit a little more coherently. Shame he's dead now! Could've learned a lot.

PHOBOS AND ZERO

Okay I might not explain this one so much cus I wanna make it its own art/post one day but essentially, Phobos has a rubix cube. Its a figurative representation of what he has, what he failed to achieve, what he was searching for and how he failed to grasp the larger picture. The cube was never solved, but Zero thinks maybe one day, it might. Zero often visited Phobos in the Other Place, until she stopped. Phobos sort of misses it, especially because he's not got much longer now.

AUDITOR AND ZERO

Fairly self-explanatory I think. Or maybe I'm tired which is also true lol. Anyway, Zero is a real pain for the Auditor because of the way she interacts with reality, is difficult to plan around/for, and just the simple fact she's just as good a killer/an unstoppable (but killable) force as Hank. She's not as prone to spontaneous events of mass murder, but she fundamentally opposes Auditor's role - a custodian of the Machine, even if they don't understand it fully. Very annoying when you already have an active nightmare to deal with on top of not knowing how your boss well, operates. The fact they can't even put up wanted posters of her is absurdly frustrating, and every time they've tried to approximate its stupid things like "the Hat Man", which no Agent takes seriously and is just plain confused by.

Auditor just kind of has to begrudgingly deal with it. Maybe coercion or something would work. (It wouldn't.)

SHERIFF AND ZERO

With Sheriff, Zero is fascinated by the idea that there can be TRUE kindness despite the circumstances, despite the structure and code and tendencies of this world. What I wrote on Zero's summary image puts it well: Sheriff represents resilience, kindness and a human element that can prevail despite the way Nevada is. Zero respects him, and while not a lot of things affect her emotionally, this is one of the things that makes Zero "happy." Basically surprised to see something human overcome the odds in such an inhuman environment. I feel like there's more detail I could go into but I need it to cook a bit more and I might need specific examples or trains of thought to flesh it out. Not sure. One thing is that Zero saved Sheriff's life during a fight around the S3LF Eater debacle. Most of my Sheriff thoughts are contained within my+a friends OCxcanon with him, anyhoo. Zero is more just... pleasantly surprised he exists, that he can exist.

I'll explain Sanford and Zero more when I get a better grasp on them and will probably go into detail about SQ as a whole with her. Welcome to still ask about them though, the changed version is a lot better than the previous lines.

some up-to-date lore bits and relationship charts with Zero!

#madness combat #oc: zero #if you see this one peepo or orion - its mostly edited and grammatically formatted from what i sent you two eheh #“slightly detailed” yeah i mean i guess it doesn't cover everything but its still a lot. whtaever. i like writing #_text #im tagging these mfs now. besides SQ cus i didn't talk about em as much #the auditor #jebediah christoff #dr gonne #dr crackpot #madness combat victor #the sheriff #madness combat phobos #tricky the clown

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tilskkarishma · 3 days ago

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I'm back – quietly, but with purpose

I wasn't sure if I would ever return.

My personal life has been shaken. My partner broke up with me after our trip to Japan, and even though we're still in some kind of emotional limbo, the weight of it has been hard to carry.

It left me drained, unsure, fragile.

🌸 Japan changed me

Visiting Japan (especially Yokohama) grounded me in a way I didn't expect. I walked the streets not as a fan, but as someone trying to find peace. I visited Mori's grave in Tokio. I left a small message. I want to return one day (maybe for his death anniversary) and offer a sotoba in his name.

It may sound strange, but that kind of dedication gives me strength right now. ♥

📖 A Quiet Return to Words

I've read many books and have written since I was a child: poems, stories, journals. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but it has always been a part of me. Now, I want to return to it with more seriousness and intention.

Most of what I write will be in German, and I may not share everything publicly or at least not through this blog, but possibly a sideblog.

I've recently chosen a Gō (号), a traditional Japanese writer's name, to reflect this quieter, more introspective part of me. Under that name, I may one day share selected poems or reflections in my own rhythm, and in my native language.

✍ More than a fan – a writer, a learner.

Mori Ōgai translated great German works into Japanese. I grew up loving many of those German classics. It inspires me to go the other way and perhaps one day translate Hirotsu Ryūrō's works into German. (They don't exist in German at all, and I think they should.)

So I'm going to keep learning Japanese – slowly, seriously, with care. Not because I "have to", but because it matters to me.

🖋️ Tumblr activities – slow, but still alive and with new rules!

I won't be fully returning to roleplay yet. My time is limited, and emotionally I'm not there.

But I'll continue to maintain the Masterlist, and I have new ideas for the Yokohama Blog, which has become one of the parts I enjoy the most.

In all of this, I've been trying to reconnect with what matters to me. And that brought me back here. Carefully, and on my own new terms:

⚖️ Rules – and a boundary I should've set long ago

I used to be someone who never blocked anyone, unless they were obvious scammers. I kept trying to be patient, to understand, to explain. But the truth is: I burned myself out trying to please people who only saw me as a machine. I've reached my limit and I won't waste my energy or care on people who drain me. I don't want to be a people pleaser anymore, because I'm done being easy to access. I came close to quitting this space entirely, simply because a few individuals couldn’t take a silent "no" as an answer.

From now on:

⚠️RULES⚠️

🔹 I do not want DMs. They cause me deep stress. If you're not one of the very few I talk to → please don't message me privately! 🔹 I reply when I can. I have a full-time job and many other things I want to achieve in real life. 🔹 This blog is a personal space. It's not here to serve your schedule, needs or social expectations. 🔹 If you push past my boundaries, you will be blocked. Quietly, without drama. I don't owe anyone explanations anymore.

💬 If you're still here: thank you.

I know this isn't the most cheerful return post. But it's honest.

If you're here for stories, for quiet inspiration, for a space that’s personal and real: you're welcome. :)

Let’s build something thoughtful. Even slowly, even imperfectly.

🎞️ Also – for those interested:

I'll be releasing a new AMV this Friday and in honour of both Mori's death (9 July) and Hirotsu's birthday (15 July), I hereby declare this month Hiromori-Month! (A completely unofficial celebration... but it amuses me. xD)

And one last thing:

This community has fallen far too quiet, so consider this me clapping my hands loudly to wake everyone up again. Let's bring some life back into it, shall we? ^^

#mod rants #kinda a comeback #new rules #rules #mori #journey

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scoobydoodean · 2 days ago

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i always thought sam garnered more of john’s pride cause i could see john as the type of man to be proud of sam’s rebelliousness even if he didn’t like it/support it, and then dean got his trust and more softness (not very often still but still more than sam). could you elaborate on why you think dean gets john’s pride?

context

So I think we're talking about some of the same things but assigning them differently as pride versus love? I see the trust that John gave Dean as a sign of pride rather than love, and I think I disagree that Dean received more softness. I think it's more that Dean typically made himself malleable to avoid confrontation and played peacemaker, while Sam didn't. This can come across as John being softer with Dean, but their calmer interactions are down to Dean's choices in how he interacts with their father (until the end of the season). John actually gets on Dean's case quite a bit when they're working together (which I will get into more).

John and Sam clashed all of the time, but John demonstrates love by worrying and checking up on Sam at school (1.08). He focuses on Sam's safety in a way Dean felt John would not and did not with him. We we build on the notion that John protected Sam in a way that he didn't protect Dean as we move through the season, and Dean needs help and is not answered when he cries and begs (1.09) and when he is dying (1.12). Dean references both of these moments when he reacts with rage in 1.21 when John dares to get on his case for not telling John that Sam was having more powerful visions that came with headaches (but he didn't answer when Dean's heart was giving out). We also see this in 1.20, when a conversation where John explains in a heart to heart that he feared for Sam's safety and it consumed everything (see how soft John is capable of being with Sam here) is immediately followed by John using Dean as bait for vampires. Dean also knows that John checked up on Sam while Sam was at school (1.08).

When John speaks with Dean fondly, he always centers pride. He says to Dean "I am so proud of you" in 2.01 right before his death. He also tells Dean he is proud of him again in 14.13. Later, he tells both Sam and Dean simultaneously that he is proud of them and loves them, but in their separate, private conversations, John emphasizes for Dean that he is proud of him, while John and Sam's conversation centers their fight before Stanford, and Sam saying that he knew John loved them and did his best.

In his speech to Dean in 2.01, John also speaks of the burdens Dean shouldered both apologetically and with (I think) a certain amount of pride. Then he asks Dean for more, asking him to save Sam or kill him. He places responsibility for hunting and for Azazel on Dean's shoulders in his stead. When John becomes unavailable to hunt, he leaves a voicemail message that tells anyone looking for help from him to call Dean. When he turns himself over to Meg in 1.21, it's with the understanding that Sam and Dean will face Azazel in his stead, and he hands the Colt to Dean, making it clear that it's his responsibility. All of this speaks of trust. (Also see: My big post about Sam wanting so desperately to be trusted).

John could also be very hard on Dean in ways that he wasn't hard on Sam. From a young age (as young as 9), he trusted Dean to be home alone taking care of Sam for days with a gun (1.18, 2.22), while he waited longer to let Sam hunt (and Sam was jealous) (11.08) and Sam seems to have had the secret of hunting kept from him until a longer age (2.22, 3.08), though part of this was possibly Dean's influence. John's expectations of Dean were higher, and he shifted blame for his own decisions onto Dean: He blamed 9 year old Dean for Sam nearly being killed by the shtriga, when John was the one who left his two young children alone with a child-eating monster on the loose (1.18). He felt guilty when he learned Sam's visions had worsened and blamed Dean for not calling to tell him about them (1.21). He fights with Sam in 1.20 and then lashes out at Dean in the aftermath over the car (Sam arguably learns this pattern of projecting onto Dean from their father). John punishes Dean for disobedience and losing their poker money by leaving him in jail (9.07). He punishes Dean in some way when Sam runs away, but Sam doesn't seem to remember being punished for running away at all (5.16). Bobby and John also clash over whether a young Dean should practice shooting or play catch in the park (7.10). We can pair John lashing out at Bobby for taking Dean to play catch with John keeping Sam's soccer trophy in storage because he couldn't bare to throw it away (3.03). This is further juxtaposed with Dean finding in the same storage unit that John had saved the sawed off shotgun Dean had made when he was a child. These moments center John's expectations were higher for Dean, which demonstrates a belief in his potential for success, but also given the context, a level of disposability relative to Sam. So [in terms of aptitude] Dean is respected (or is seen as having the potential to be respected) while Sam is not, but Sam is sheltered (therefore seen as precious) and Dean is not... and they're both a little jealous of each other because of it.

Sam notes in 1.08 that John was disappointed in him because Sam wanted to go to school and play soccer instead of focus on sharpening his hunting skills (here). This points us toward Sam feeling John was never proud of him. The episode concludes with Sam realizing that John does care about him and wanting to apologize for his part in their fight, but I think the feelings about lack of respect and trust persist. Sam's feelings here certainly play a role in his rage at John's vague directions throughout the season, culminating in Sam and John's screaming match in 1.20. Sam doesn't like being treated like a child—he wants to be treated as a partner and John won't give him that, and it drives Sam crazy.

In terms of love, from Dean's perspective, one of John's kids was allowed to be a child, and the other was not. Dean makes it quite clear that he sees the pressure John put on him as a sign that he was trusted (but too much, with burdens that were too big) and was considered disposable in a way that Sam was not. By season 5, Dean so bitter at John over his abandonments that he repeatedly calls him a deadbeat (5.16, 5.17). There's his resentment when "Adam" talks about John racing to town to see him, something Dean does not believe John would ever do for him (4.19), based on experience. Dean's whole Dean vs. Dean encounter in 3.10 centers the pattern of Sam's safety being taken seriously and Dean being treated as disposable. From Dean's perspective, John sheltering Sam proved that he loved Sam, but did not not love Dean. When Sam pissed John off, they would shout at each other; when Dean pissed John off, John would send Dean away (14.12). This gifset re: Dean's disposability will also be of interest.

Many of these things I have written long posts about, so feel free to check out my Sam and John tag #we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone and my Dean and John tag #i dont deserve what he put on me.

#mail #i dont deserve what he put on me #we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone

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hollowed-theory-hall · 2 days ago

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Do you think that when Kreacher dies will Harry get another House Elf, or not?

Personally, I say no. Harry didn't intend to acquire Kreacher, he just came with Grimmauld Place. Actually going out and purchasing another Elf would be a step too far for Harry. While he's not as gung-ho about House Elf rights as Hermione, he is still sympathetic towards them.

No, I think Kreacher will be it for Harry as far as House Elf ownership goes.

Talked about Harry and his stance on House Elves here.

And I agree, I don't see Harry going out of his way to purchase a House Elf — ever. Also, since House Elves live much longer than Wizards, it's possible Kreacher, old as he is, will outlive Harry, as according to a tweet from JKR in 2017, Kreacher dies at the age of 666 (we do not know when that will be, though).

I don't think the idea of buying a House Elf would ever really occur to Harry. It's not something he'd consider a possibility, I think, even if Kreacher died before Harry (which I don't think is very likely, if elves really live that long).

#harry potter #hp #harry james potter #asks #anonymous

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badgalsasuke · 11 hours ago

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Have people discussed why when Naruto is thinking about the bonds he eventually formed he places Sasuke on the side of the girls?

Other people noticed it but they didn't actually analyse anything out of this. And it's interesting because Kishimoto could've had Naruto placing Sasuke by Kakashi's side and that'd make the composition symmetrical and more visually appealing, but he didn't.

Some people in the post I linked above think it's related to Sasuke's heroine-type of status in the story.

Which reminds me of Hayato Date's conversation with band FLOW, Date was director of the Naruto anime from its inception until before Madara's fight against the shinobi alliance.

And it was also pointed out by Ito Go in his essay for the Kizuna: The Words that Bind Heaven Scroll book.

This is a translation published by the University of Minnesota Press for Mechademia: Second Arc which a biannual journal series designed to promote academic and professional discourse around East Asian popular cultures.

However, I noticed they skipped certain sentences (including the title of this excerpt of the entire essay where Ito Go calls Sasuke the heroine) from the original Japanese essay. So I will post another translation here

Sasuke's "heroine" relationship (サスケの「ヒロイン」的関係性)

The person whose "true feelings" are the least visible is Sasuke, the core of the story, who stands opposite Naruto. The deepening intimacy and repeated "denial" that unfold between the two are the axis that drives the story of this work. Sasuke leaves his friends and becomes a runaway ninja, and Naruto pursues him. Compared to Naruto, who has grown into a hero recognized by those around him, Sasuke, who has been popular from the beginning and is still wanted/sought after by many characters, is treated like a heroine, even though he is a man.

Among them, the strong feelings that Naruto has for Sasuke are like friendship and brotherly love. Let's call it "love" in a broad sense. Think of it as a higher concept that refers to intimate feelings such as friendship and familial love, rather than romantic feelings.

Sasuke's motivation for leaving the village was to take revenge on his brother, Uchiha Itachi, and to gain strong power to do so. However, he strongly asserts his reason for actively cutting off ties with his friends and the village of Konohagakure. This behavior can be interpreted as an escape from the close community with his comrades. It is due to a "denial" of acknowledging the affection directed towards him. In particular, it is a "denial" of his intimate relationship with Naruto. The psychology of this "denial" is fully depicted in the long sequence in which Sasuke tries to kill Naruto at the Valley of the End. He tries to kill Naruto, following his brother's words that he can awaken his Mangekyo Sharingan by fulfilling the condition of "killing his closest friend." However, he is unable to kill Naruto. By trying to kill Naruto, he unintentionally acknowledges that Naruto is his most important friend. The act of "killing for a purpose" itself denies friendship and love towards the other person. Can someone who is willing to kill for one's own purpose really be called "the closest friend" in the true sense of the word? However, the choice of who to kill can only be made by asking one's own heart. In the dilemma of "killing his closest friend," Sasuke chose Naruto. By denying the very existence of friendship, he acknowledged it. It's a "denial" in the literal sense of the word. Sasuke says that the reason he couldn't kill Naruto was because he resented having to get the Mangekyo Sharingan as a result of his brother's influence. But was that the truth? We readers know that it wasn't. In the middle of their fight, a "mental landscape" appears. It shows two children holding hands. The psychology of "denial" occurs without the awareness that one is "denying." In "inner speech," it is still possible to lie to oneself, that is, to lie against one's true feelings to convince oneself. But that is not the case with mental landscapes. Sasuke's "true feelings" are something that Sasuke himself cannot see. The more "invisible" something is, the more one can believe it. I think this principle is probably the idea that runs through the foundation of "Naruto." As the story progresses towards its finale, I am looking forward to seeing how this principle will be reflected in the story.

What's interesting here is that, even though Ito Go acknowledges Sasuke is in the position of a "heroine", he doesn't want to call Naruto and Sasuke's feelings for each other romantic. Makes you wonder what's the line that separates a heroine from a love interest.

But back to the images at the very top of this post, I'd love to hear what you guys think about it.

#narusasu #sasunaru #sns

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theallianceofcelestials · 2 days ago

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could we. could we. maybe. have a drabble about eclipse from Sea talking to his father about something like either thinking about what he'd think would be a picture perfect guy (unknowingly describing the new Ruin SCP??) or maybe if KC could make tea and cookies for him maybe?? Please?

Well SEA Eclipse thinks he's aromantic, so he's not gonna really describe what he thinks would be the perfect guy for him lol. He thinks there's no one like that

So tea and cookies it is!

Just a little disclaimer, certain events in this are not canon to SEA (meaning KC and Eclipse's behaviour with each other is canon, but some of the topics they discuss aren't)

It has been a hard day at work for his son. Made especially obvious by how he threw himself into one of the kitchen chairs with a groan and hasn't gotten up from there since.

Now, through some careful signalling Killcode managed to get his brothers to herd his other children away, lest they accidentaly make Eclipse's irritation worse. This situation requires a certain precision he can admit some of his children... don't exactly have.

Even if he's very proud of all of them and loves them so much, it's for the best Bloodmoon with their brash personalities, Lunar with his childishness and even his brother Moon with his playful jabs aren't in the room right now. Solar Flare and Sun, who could have possibly helped greatly here, would also hinder the process of destressing Eclipse right now he fears.

The less people here, the better. His eldest needs his quiet.

So he decided to make his favourite tea, mint which speaks of lovely taste if Killcode says so himself, and some cookies to hopefully help take his mind off of his worries. Or at least to bring some amusement back. Let's just hope his attempt at dinosaur shaped gooey chocolate cookies will stay recognisable.

Through it all his child doesn't even move, which is concerning. He'd ask for a bite of the chocolate sauce by this point usually

...

The situation is much graver than he thought

He grabs two mugs, pouring each of them a generous dose of tea. By this point he knows his child's exact tastes, how much honey he likes in his tea, how he likes a slice of lemon too. But he also knows he enjoys mint tea with just sugar too. Perhaps just sweetness would be better now.

Finally, he's acknowledged with a quiet thanks. He smiles softly at Eclipse, hoping to see him relax just a bit more. Even if it's slow going

They do nothing but quietly drink their tea for a while, at least until his timer goes off and he goes to check on the cookies he specifically made for his eldest.

They're a bit fatter than they were when he put them in, but they're servicable. His child might even find them cute.

But only after they cooled. Warm dough is not good for the stomach

"What are those?"

Ah, good. He was beginning to worry a bit

"A surprise for later, after they've cooled"

Eclipse grumbles, but it's with less energy than usual. He'd argue tooth and nail to get a taste of the cookies early.

Hmm, how else to help, how else to help?

Perhaps letting him complain? Eclipse loves to do that. And he's amusing while he does it too.

"Did any of your coworkers do anything?"

Eclipse gives a dramatic groan, and Killcode knows he has him. His child may be smart, and he may think himself subtle, but he's very much not so when he gets into a mood. Looking back, he should have realised his child wanted to rant at him.

"What didn't they do?! We have this new SCP guy, can't say much about him but he's around and he's annoying as fuck, and he's kinda like you-"

Something in his chest twists, memories of him coming back, but that's absurd, he can't be here, he can't because he's dead-

"-aaaand, now I gotta figure out if this guy was raving about mushrooms like some madman, wouldn't be surprised actually, or, if he was talking about angles for some reason??"

Killcode, having not listened to what was essentially the entirety of his child's sentence, hums simply, hoping Eclipse won't notice him zoning out.

Thankfully, it seems like his input is not needed.

"And you wanna know what the most infuriatiing thing is?!"

"What?"

Eclipse takes in a deep vent, reaching for a cookie he's since placed on the table.

"He's british"

Killcode blinks, processes what was said, and bursts out laughing.

His child, clearly having aimed for such a reaction with that little comment of his, leans back with a grin, finally biting into the cookie he's holding. He, predictably, loses him after that.

He makes himself more comfortable on his pillow, ignoring the slightly stronger twinge of pain from one of his knees, and settles in for what he knows will be some more complaining about a new SCP he can't actually be told anything important about.

He wouldn't trade it for anything in the world

#OurEssays #Moongleam answers #Scientist Eclipse's Adventures #the sun and moon show #sun and moon show #tsams #sams #tsams killcode #sams killcode #tsams eclipse #sams eclipse #teaps eclipse #eaps eclipse #dadcode #still managed to shove Ruin in there lol #he snuck his way in smh

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numbuh-72 · 2 days ago

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LIFE UPDATE

Hey guys, Lexi here!

I know I've gone radio silent for awhile especially with my art... So it's time I explain what's been going on;

CW: MEDICAL TALK

After returning from my first ever convention, NostalgiaCon, I've begun having some... Problems physically and mentally.

It started with having bad abdominal pain at work one day, to the point where I could barely stand. I rushed to urgent care straight after my shift and got a UTI. I was given medicine and needed to cut back on a lot of foods and really have more water.

To which I was good after a week, but the next thing to have hit me was chest pain and weakness in my arms. So going to the urgent care again, I have and currently still have, costochondritis. Which is inflammation around the chest area. I was given medicine, but only took it for two days, even if it's supposed to be for 7. The only reason I stopped was because I started experiencing heartburn, struggling to swallow and lack of saliva production... Assuming it's dry mouth rn- Luckily the chest pain isn't like.. As bad, but it comes back round now and then.

Last year, I was diagnosed with heart palpitations... But wasn't sure if it was like a one time thing... But I am seeing a cardiologist about it to be absolutely sure, and the current plan is to give me an ECHO exam; Wearing a heart monitor and keeping it on for 7 days. The reason is to find any abnormality with my heart.

I've also been seeing the doctor a lot lately because of a condition I've had since high school called PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome). It's a condition that irregulates my cycles due to me being obese. I used to take those birth control pills, but stopped around 2019. Ever since then... Uh, it hasn't really did me much in favor.

I did get my results very recently from an ultrasound we did around my pelvis area, and they did indeed find a cyst that's about 2 inches... Not only that but because of my UTI that happened recently, it did ring some bells in the bladder... So I need to do another thing for further investigation on that.

I also needed to do a blood test to follow up on my anemia on iron and vitamin D.

Soo... That's as far as physical, now for my mental.

During one of my doctor visits, I was given a test for anxiety and depression.... I didn't think it was that bad-

I got diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder (GAD).

So because of that, I was given a psychiatric to be able to push me through this anxiety. So far it's been working, what's causing my anxiety though is all the medical stuff that's been happening to me. I even brought it up to him and he understood. The goal is to just, continue with this journey and remain calm, continue to use my methods to maintain my anxiety.

So far that journey is making progress, but there is still ways to go.

Andd.... I believe that's all I covered for now... I'm currently in a battle and journey for all of this stuff, but I promise I'm ok! I got my family and friends like you guys supporting me the best way possible.

Now in regards to art, I am slowly making my way back to drawing, but production is slower because of my chest pain... But I am drawing! I am still planning to attend Art Fight, but I've just been working on the ref sheets and line up ATM.

If you wish to see who I have done at least, check out my art fight page! For this year I'm gonna do my South Park OCS! There will be 6 of them! 3 are done so far, but there's still 3 more to go!

For the meantime hope you guys understand my situation, but thought I give this update to reassure some that I am still around!

Thanks for reading! Lexi, out!

#artist speaks #artist thoughts #speaking my mind #possible vent?

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coolfireguy73 · 1 day ago

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Charadesign Analysis #1 : Spamton !

Character: Spamton G. Spamton (and a bit of Addisons) Media: Deltarune SPOILER WARNING

Spamton, we all know Spamton !

I wanted to try something new here. Charadesign (and character history) is my passion ! Really !

I love analyzing characters and I thought maybe some people would be interested, this one will be more of a compilation of what we know about him than a real analysis because of the nature of the character, so without any more useless text, here is Spamton charadesign analysis :

Different designs :

What's interesting with Spamton is that he didn't always look like that, presumably... To my knowledge we've never seen a full body of what Spamton originally looked like.

It could be anything, especially since Tenna doesn't recognize him in chapter 3. (This could be a joke but still it doesn't help)

We do have some infos and assumptions we can make:

1. The poster right after his first encounter.

We can't see much and we can't confirm if he looked different before he started making sales (which is supposedly before this poster was made)

But we do see he has black hair and pink cheeks (which I will talk about later so keep it in mind)

2. Also, the lack of glasses.

That may be more obvious but we know Spamton started wearing his colored glasses to look like Swatch to sneak in Queen's mansion, so after he got kicked out. (He may have started wearing black and white clothes for the same reasons)

Thank to that line in Swatch's shop:

And spamton Q&A:

3. The hair color

This part about "-$0.99 hair" I don't really know what to do with.

Given Spamton is an Addison (more on that later) he should have hair the same color as his skin.

So either he had already black hair, explaining why the price is negative (?) or it's just a quirk of Spamton's language and he did have white hair.

(It could also be that the wig cost him $0.99 thus he now down $0.99, or even that he just dyed them and therefor they can't be sold.)

It's quite confusing but I will get to more theorizing and headcannon at the end.

The mouth and cheeks :

Spamton, as well as the Addisons (maybe) don't seem able to close their mouths.

It make sense since we see in his shop sprite Spamton has a hinged mouth much like a puppet (this ties back to his story arc obviously) explaining the frozen mouth.

Interestingly enough the hinges lines aren't visible in his darkworld sprite (space an readability is why) that COULD indicate that the others Addisons have hinges too but it's just not visible since we never see them in a proper shop.

We also always see them smiling. This also make sense in a charadesign stand point as they are supposed to be salesman, it's their entire personality.

Anyway, the only part we actualy see moving (other that the bottom) are the corners of the mouth and the cheeks.

Speaking of the cheeks, as we already saw in the in game poster, his cheeks were pink. But now they are red !

It's an old poster, are the color faded ? But the black part aren't.

I thought about it, but while rewatching a compilation of spamton shop dialogue I noticed something I had forgotten.

His cheeks disappear when he stops smiling. They aren't permanent part of his cheeks (like I used to think)

Now why do they change color ? I don't know.

A possible explanation could be this:

They get redder the wider his smile is. (I would tie it to the physical aspect no emotional, I don't think it has anything to do with his actual level of happiness)

It's not perfect, (why would he be less happy at his supposed peak and more happy now) but it could be argued. This would just allow every color to exist at the same time.

Spamton and the Addisons:

Earlier I said he used to be an Addison.

These guys (just in case you didn't know).

Makes sense: the permanent smile, the classy black v neck T-shirt and their position as salesman all throughout the cyber city.

They both acknowledge each other as part of the same group.

About their differences Spamton said:

And the Addisons said:

From that (and the hair color problem we talked about earlier) either he was just a smaller Addison for no particular reason, or there IS a difference between them.

My guess would be that the Addisons represent adds on websites etc.. and Spamton is specifically e-mail adds. Which, since his the only one we see, would mean more work to reach less potential buyers.

It would make sense with his name and his constent association with e-mail, specifically by Tenna.

Interpretation, headcannon and theories:

So, taking all of that into account let's have fun and try to put all of this into a chronological evolution of his design.

1. The original mail walker

For the first design I debated a little about the color of his pants and his hair. But since none of them ever mention anything about it (and to make the progression a bit more interesting) I decided to give him the same clothes and hair.

Nothing much to say.

2. The calm before the storm

His supposed design around the time he started living at Queen's mansion. Sales are through the roof, all is good.

I see a lot of people drawing him with a red suit. Don't get me wrong, he looks handsome in this little red tuxedo but I'm trying to stay as close as possible to the in game design.

Also, again, on the in game poster we can see hi has a black top.

It looks like hair but given his design it's most likely his shoulder.

I still made it a suit jacket because at that point he's staring to make money, I would imagine he wanted to look more fancy.

The poster is also why I gave him black hair, it could be explain in univers the same wait as the jacket, wanting to change looks. New look new me mentality you know.

Also the white pants in preparation for his last design.

3. The downfall.

You'll notice his design didn't change much.

Realistically after his sales went completely flat and being evicted from Queens castel he never let go of his "rich" clothes.

He's still living in the past and this is one of the ways he does it.

I obviously made the clothes more jagged and and his white pants turned a bit gray.

And, of course, the glasses.

I don't have any specific reason for giving him a turtleneck, other than maybe it's cold in the trash zone (?) I've just always drawn him with a turtleneck I'm used to it now I can't see him without it.

In my opinion it supports the "lost in the dump" look.

I surely forgot some things, and if you want to add anything feel free to reblog this, anyway...

Thanks for reading all the way, I'm just writing this to ramble. Charadesign really IS my passion and I have to shout in the void about it.

I have to !

As a gift please take this pipis:

#charadesign analysis #character design #charadesign #spamton #spamton g spamton #deltarune #headcannons #rambeling #please excuse my brainrot #I'm a nerd I know

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dreamlike--reality · 1 day ago

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==it's lily. Lily F Neumann. Pardon me for being on my toes around you after what you did. I trust that I don't need to describe in depth exactly that which i am referring to. Mostly because if I did, we would be here for days.==

==your vile efforts at niceties mean nothing, your attempts at making amends mean nothing. you are worth less than the scum under my shoe, the dirt under Malcolm Myers' nail holds more value than you do. Be grateful that I don't evaporate you in front of your girlfriend. At least this way you'll get a funeral. if I wasn't holding back, there wouldn't be anyone left to hold one.==

==never forget what you did. I'll live with my sins until the sun blows up and i no longer have the energy to wind my spring.. had you not been there, i would have been able to live a human life with my sister in a perfect world molded with my own two hands. a picturesque ending for two girls who had their lives robbed by circumstances. but you had to step in and ruin it.==

{tears begin to fall from her face yet again, staining the skeletal frame below her.}

==you took a life i didn't know i wanted from me. a life i didn't know was possible. a life i couldn't even imagine. and now here we are. slaving away at a facsimile of a steel corpse, puppeted around by a ghost that dragged her way back from the depths of hell. i was a monster on the inside before, and now it reflects on the outside. you made me into this... thing...==

{she grips the arm of the body on the table, denting the frame slightly under the immense pressure.}

==i'll never know the feeling of grass under my bare feet. my sister will never know the sight of my face looking back at hers in the real world.i will never look in the mirror and see myself looking back. it will always and forever be through the eyes sunken, hollow, sinful eyes of an artifice. a thing. a thinking machine that lacks the warmth of human touch. and it's all... your... fault...==

==if you ever, and I mean EVER. forget what you took from me. i promise i will make your life a living hell until the day your neurons finally give out from the pain i will inflict on you.==

@dreamlike--reality alright me and my girlfriend are here to help ya!

#guilty gear rp #lily f neumann #lily transition arc

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moonlitcelestial · 17 hours ago

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Soooo, i just saw you opened your requests heheh

I just wanted to ask a little more of Y/N and Wooyoung, if it's possible hihi

Dearest Dino,

It's so possible! I'm going to be real with you this is one of the only things I could get done this week. I've had one hit after the other and haven't really had time to flesh out the next chapter of BtL. That being said I am so excited to present you this! It falls between Chapter 25 and 26 (which I have linked for reference) Let me know what you think!! <3 Moonie

🎥 Series Masterlist 🎥

☽ Masterlist ☾

Inspiration Pictures

Pinterest Board Masterlist

Moments in Focus - Blurb Masterlist

Disclaimer: This story is purely a work of fiction. It is not meant to assume or mock anything about Ateez, Atiny, or anything relating to what I do not know about being a videographer. This story will follow several of the events that Ateez have done in the past year for Golden Hour Part 2, that being said I will not be able to include everything.

General Warnings: cussing, conflict, angst, fluff, and obliviousness.

BLURB WARNINGS - Teasing

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

Blurb 1 - Wooyoung and Y/n W/C ~4,163

You hadn’t been talking to anyone very much since the time you had returned from Paris. You were still reeling from everything and to distract yourself —without having to call the boys— you buried yourself in work. Sure it needed to get done but the deadlines were a while away, you just didn't want to deal with anything right now.

Alas, to be able to pull off the surprise you wanted to, you needed to talk to someone, and you knew the best person for the job. Wooyoung, who you messaged to call you when he had some alone time. You were working on finalizing one of the video montages you were doing when your phone started vibrating and flashing. With a glance at the thing you smiled as his contact popped up for a FaceTime call. When you slid to answer it you were met by his loud chattering to someone in the close vicinity. Wooyoung was holding the phone just under his chin out and away from himself enough that you could see his smile as he spoke.

“Hey yapper, I said alone not surrounded by people.” The smile didn't wane from your face as you spoke. You could tell you startled him by the way his speech immediately stopped in the middle of the word he was saying; and by how quickly he looked down at you.

“Noona! Hi, I was just leaving.” You hummed in response as he offered several goodbyes to the people he was with. You weren’t completely paying attention to the screen as you continued editing the montage and its transitions.

“How are you doing my rose? Is everything okay?” With a glance you could see him fully looking at the phone in hand. You paused and saved your work so you could pay him full attention.

“I’m doing okay, but I have something to ask of you.”

“Anything, you know that.”

“I am working on planning our Sannie a surprise birthday party and I’ll need your help to execute it.” His head tilted like the curious cat he is and you let a small snort out at the motion.

“I need you to make sure that on his birthday everyone has the evening and the next day off. I know we are cutting it close to the time we depart for the North America tour but we all need a break before the real chaos starts.”

“I can do that! What are you planning? Can I know?” He was grinning so widely at you and you couldn't keep your smile at bay.

“A big party with several guests and lots of fun at my house.” His head tilted to the other side.

”So what I’m hearing is a huge cuddle pile is on the table?”

“Quite possibly, it’ll depend on how the evening goes. I also need help with some of the decorations, if you have a free afternoon maybe you can help me?” You watched with amusement as he almost dropped his phone at your question.

“Me?” You nodded at him. “I’d love nothing more!”

“Alright, so when do you have a free afternoon?”

“Right now actually, I was just going to head home but I can hang out here and you can come pick me up and we can go shopping!”

“Okay, are you good with me meeting you in about an hour. I need to get dressed and get things together.” He was nodding his head vehemently as you spoke, the smile on his face hadn’t waivered in the slightest.

“Alright Wooyo I’ll see you in an hour!” You waved and blew him a flying kiss before ending the call. You were smiling, as you got up and stretched. You needed to at least get out of the house before your meeting tonight and what more of a perfect way to be with one of the ones you loved doing things for another you loved. You shooed the giants out the door of the office and shut the door behind you. With quick steps you made it up the stairs and into your bedroom to change out of your pjs, you decided to be a little bit of a tech wear queen today. You threw on a sleeveless top, some cargo pants and one of the thigh bags you had. If you were going to pull off what you wanted to, you would definitely need a little extra space. When you were satisfied with the outfit you moved to braiding your hair, with the several years of practice you were done in no time.

You made your way downstairs and into the mudroom to grab one of your several backpacks. This one had to have enough storage to fit things in and it would need to be sturdy enough to hold an extra helmet. You snagged your specified motorcycle backpack and threw it over your shoulder. As you walked out the door you slapped the garage door button and had it opening while you stopped to grab one of the helmets that had a dark visor. You snagged yours and did your glasses routine after getting the spare set up. Wooyoung was going to absolutely have a cow when he saw he would be riding Ink with you.

When you were settled you threw your leg over Ink and started her up, with a roar you were heading down the driveway while the doors to your garage closed. The trip was not nearly as long as you had initially planned, but with it being the middle of the week and the afternoon you should have known better. You pulled up into your unofficially designated parking spot and pulled your phone out from the thigh bag. With quick fingers you sent off a message to Wooyoung letting him know you were here and parked.

Not even a couple minutes later you heard the doors open and a few of your boys came out with him. He was surrounded by Mingi, Yeosang and Yunho. As soon as he spotted you his jaw dropped to the floor, when the others spotted you they were grinning. Mingi was the first to take off to come see you with one of the biggest smiles you had seen on him. You threw your leg over Ink and took off your helmet, when he got into range he picked you up and spun with you. You let out a small giggle as he set you back onto your own two feet and grabbed your face to kiss you.

“Yah! She’s mine for the afternoon, don't hog her!” Mingi separated from you and you were laughing at the glare he sent to Wooyoung. Yunho and Yeosang approached and gave you light hugs and gentle kisses. Wooyoung screeched again and you turned toward the man who was trying and failing to start a scuffle with one of the tallest of your boys.

“Youngie. They haven’t seen me either, be nice.” His head whipped toward you and he immediately stopped and tucked his hands together in front of him.

“Sorry Noona.” You rolled your eyes and looked over to Yunho who was trying to hide his grin. He knew exactly where Wooyoung’s mind went– and so did you.

“Come here, let’s get you set up.” He immediately walked over to you with a bashful smile. You turned and pointed to the motorcycle behind you.

“Sit.” Without a word of protest he followed your orders. You could feel the stifling of laughter behind you as you took off the backpack and grabbed the helmet. As you looked back to him he was looking up at you with his beautiful asymmetric eyes, they were wide as you took his chin and dipped his head to place a kiss on his forehead before sliding the helmet on. When you had it situated where it needed to be you tilted his chin up to look at the ceiling as you adjusted the chinstrap.

You heard the door click again and you were met with shouting as the other men realized you were here. You finished getting Wooyoung’s chin strap to be snug enough that the helmet wouldn’t move. You knew his internal speakers were on so you spoke low making sure the other boys couldn’t hear you.

“Behave yourself otherwise I cancel the shopping trip. Not a word about the party or so help me I will take away your cuddling privileges with me for a week when everyone gets back into the groove of how things usually are. Understand?”

He was nodding at you and you didn’t have to see his eyes to know that they were most likely dialated at the small dom behavior from you. You turned to greet the rest of your boys and San immediately picked you up just like Mingi had not even a few minutes ago. “Jagi (Sweetie) I didn’t know you were coming here, what are you up to?”

“Just in town to do some shopping, I needed a couple of things and can only get them in the city. I also have a meeting with the team in a few hours.”

”Can we go with you?” You turned to look over at Seonghwa who was lightly pouting at you.

“I only have room for one, Youngie was on the phone with me when I was making my list and he offered to go with me. Besides, don’t the rest of you have a schedule?” Seonghwa nodded at you and the rest were pouting. Hongjoong hung toward the back of the group and you could tell he was hesitant to even join the conversation.

“When are you going to start covering our things again?” Hongjoong had spoken so quietly you almost missed it. All of the boys tensed, and Wooyoung stood from his spot resting on Ink to put a hand on your lower back. He had put his visor up so he could see everyone clearly. Currently, he was silently sending death threats to his captain for even asking that.

“When I finish the projects I have currently so they don’t fall by the wayside when we travel to North America.”

“So not until next week? Or even then?”

“I will be with all of you while we travel to North America before then I’m not sure. I have a lot of final projects I need to do for clients that came before all of you.” He nodded his head and kept his chin down. You looked over to Seonghwa who was closest to him and he was offering you a small nod that he would help take care of Hongjoong. For how much of an ass he was then you still deeply cared for him.

“Noona, that store you were mentioning is closing soon, we should head out so we can make it in time!” You looked to Wooyoung and gave him a nod of your head while the other boys started pouting.

“I’ll see all of you soon. Take care of yourselves. I love you.” You placed a kiss on all of their cheeks and Hongjoong jumped when you gave him the same treatment, it wouldn’t be fair to him if you didn’t give him the same love even if you were still frustrated with his actions.

Without a word you did your glasses routine and sapped your visor down. You offered them a nod and a small flying kiss before turning to Wooyoung and gently putting his visor down. “Can you take the backpack?”

He nodded to you and you picked the backpack up to help him into it. When he was situated you turned to throw your leg over Ink and motioned for him to follow. He had perfectly situated himself behind you and put his feet on the pegs you had pointed out to Hongjoong what felt like forever ago. “Ready?”

“Always.” You turned on the motorcycle and the boys surrounding you took a couple of steps back. You took off and Wooyoung was cackling behind you. A small smile came to your own face.

When you pulled into the parking lot of the mall you slowed to a stop in one of the closer parking spaces and turned off Ink. Wooyoung was practically bouncing as he got off the motorcycle. When you got off you did your glasses routine and clipped your helmet to the small hook set on your thigh bag. Wooyoung was standing there watching you with what you’d assume is a grin. As soon as you stepped close enough he sat sidesaddle on Ink and tilted his head to the sky. You decided that it would be fun to be a bit of a tease so you let the words slip from your mouth like a praise. “Good boy.”

His adams apple bobbed and you could tell immediately he was going to be red faced as soon as you had the helmet off of him. As the clip came free you let your fingers skim the bottom of his chin as you gently pulled the helmet off. A small almost imperceptible whimper came from the man seated in front of you. You let out a small huff of laughter through your nose and tucked the helmet on the side opposite to where yours was situated.

”Hold this and stay still Aein (Sweetheart).” You handed him the helmet and he gently put it on his lap while you moved to fix his helmet hair. He was leaning into you so heavily you worried that if you moved your hands away from him he would fall forward.

“I think I have it fixed,” his eyes wandered up to yours and he was watching you closely with his wide boba eyes. You held out your hand for the helmet and he placed his hand in yours to intertwine your fingers. The laughter that came out was immediate.

“Why are you laughing noona?” Wooyoung had stood up and tilted his head at you. He had the helmet in the hand that wasn’t holding yours.

“I was going to take the helmet, Aein (Sweetheart), but I appreciate the sentiment.” His face turned an even deeper red than it had been– and not because of the summer heat. He offered you the helmet and you took it from him before chastely placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Cute.” —He grumbled something under his breath— “What was that?”

“Nothing Noona.” You squinted at him and he folded like a card.

“I’m not cute.” Your laughter increased.

”You hang out with Yeo too much. So what are you then? Sexy? Handsome? Pretty? Beautiful? Brat? or Mine?" His brain needed a second to process the words coming out of your mouth. When he stopped buffering he sputtered.

“Yours, always your Brat Noona.” Your eyebrows raised as he slapped a hand over his mouth and his eyes almost popped out of his head.

“Then be a good brat for me and turn around so I can put the helmet away.” He scrambled up off Ink before turning his back to you. You were holding back your laughter at how quickly he complied with your demand. When the helmet was clipped into place you rested your hand on his shoulder and leaned in.

“Always my brat huh?” He almost leapt away from you and you started giggling while he landed a light smack to your arm.

“Noona, don’t be mean.”

“As if you are in any place to make demands Aein (Sweetheart).” You turned on your heel and started walking, the helmet attached to your thigh bag was swinging lightly and every so often it would hit your leg. You could hear him before you felt him, his hand was immediately intertwined with yours as you made your way into the mall. With a glance you saw that he had pulled out a mask and a ball cap to put on. You reached into your thigh bag and pulled yours out to put on too. (Hat) If you were going to be out in public with him you had to be careful.

Throughout the entire time you and Wooyoung were shopping he never strayed far from your side. He had pointed all of the things out that San may like and you almost immediately put them into the small basket you were toting around. He was just talking to fill the space while you listened, and when he dragged you into a clothing store you knew you were in for some fun.

He was leading you straight to the hoodies and more comfortable things and when you made it he was bouncing in excitement. You let go of his hand and he looked back to you questioningly and when you motioned for him to start looking he quickly came over to press a masked kiss to your cheek that was also covered. He was immediately looking for something specific and as soon as he found it he held two hoodies up to you. It was a pair, something you would see in a cute couples ad, they read: “The Yapper, The Listener”

It couldn’t have been more perfect, both hoodies were black with white text. “Can I get them for us, Noona?”

His entire face was pleading with you, and you could only see his eyes. They were sparkling in the weird lighting of the store. You knew he would beg you and possibly do it anyway even if you said no. “You can if you would like Aein (Sweetheart). I would be more than happy to wear a cute matching hoodie with you.”

The joy that immediately flickered to life in his eyes was one of the most adorable things you had ever seen. He rushed past you and immediately made his way to the counter where the woman was smiling at his enthusiasm as he approached. You followed at your own pace and came up to the counter while she was laughing at something he said. Her eyes caught on you and she straightened just barely before looking back at Wooyoung. She told him the total and he handed over his card before turning to glance at you. He gently brought his hands up to fix a piece of your hair and readjust your glasses while she was doing as she needed to with his card. His voice was barely audible as he spoke. “Thank you for listening to me yap, and not being afraid of doing fun things with me and matching with me.”

You grabbed his hand, “I wouldn’t trade it for the world, and your yapping is kinda cute.”

The woman behind the counter held out the small bag to you and Wooyoung immediately took it from her with a polite bow. He grabbed your hand and let his fingers intertwine with yours. “One more stop before I have to go to my meeting, Aein (sweetheart).”

This time you led him toward your favorite jewelry store. As you walked in you could feel the happiness radiate from him. You brought him over to the case and started looking for a specific piece you knew he would love. As soon as you spotted it you waved over the clerk, Wooyoung had wandered off so you could surprise him with the anxiety spinner ring. When you were finished ringing up you turned to see if you could find Woo, he was close to the display of necklaces looking over all of them thoughtfully. You walked up to him and put your chin on his shoulder around the backpack. He jumped and turned to see who you were, as soon as he met your eyes behind the thick framed glasses he relaxed.

“I got you something,” his eyes widened to comical levels. When you handed him the small bag he all but snatched it out from your grip. You held your hand out for the trash and without looking he placed the sack in your hand. His eyes were glued to the small box, when he opened it a small gasp left him.

“I know you like to mess with my rings so I figured you could have this while I'm not with you. It spins in the middle and is made of good quality metal.” his arms immediately wrapped around you and you were in a bone crushing hug. A small wheeze left you and you tucked yourself closer to him; as if that was possible with the hold he had on you.

“You’re the best.”

“Sangie says the same thing,” he pulled away from you and gave you a mocking glare before pulling the ring out and putting it on his thumb like one of yours was. He worried his thumb against the side of his hand and he was smiling the entire time he watched it spin.

“We should get you back, I need to get to a team meeting to go over some things we need to do before we start traveling.” His pout was immediate and you let out a small snort.

“That won’t work with me, don’t be a brat.” He straightened up and you grabbed his hand with a smile. You lead him back out to Ink and when you got there, there were a couple of people hanging out close to the bike. You clicked the keys and the small horn went off effectively scaring the small group of younger men away from it. Wooyoung let out a laugh and you snickered with him as you approached. When you both were in range Wooyoung sat on the motorcycle and tilted his head at you just like a cat would when they are expecting something. You walked behind him and unclipped the helmet before taking off his mask and hat and placing the helmet onto his head. When you handed them back to him he stuffed them into one of his pockets. After getting him set up you placed the small things into the backpack and zipped it up. You put your helmet on and he was already standing there watching you. When you got onto Ink he followed shortly after. He was cuddled up as close as he could be and you were smiling as you started the motorcycle and headed back to KQ.

When you got to KQ you parked and he got off quickly. For the first time today he took the helmet off himself; with a small struggle with the finicky chin strap. You had your helmet off and sitting on Ink long before he did his. As soon as it was off his helmet hair was everywhere. You brought your hand up to fix it and he was grinning at you as he closed his eyes while he leaned into your hand. When you were finished fixing his long hair his eyes shot open before he tugged you into a burning kiss. You melted into his hold as he let his trembling fingers lace themselves under the plait of your hair. He was trying to lead the kiss but you took over giving his hair a small tug. A small groan broke free of his throat before he could stifle it and you smiled into the kiss before breaking it.

“Always my bratty yapper.” your whisper sent him into almost hysterics, you were laughing as some of the other boys walked out of the building and looked at you weird.

“I think they might be waiting on you to leave,” his head whipped around and San was waving at him. He turned back to you and started taking off the backpack. Once it was in your hands you pulled out his hoodie and handed it to him. He slipped it on over his head and you shook your head at him.

“It’s hot as hell out here and you’re putting on a hoodie?”

“It’s never too hot outside for good style.” –He pulled you into a hug as you threw the backpack over your shoulder– “Thank you for today, I’m glad I got to see you, we miss having you around so much.”

“Thank you for saving me from the conversation with Joongie earlier. I promise you’ll see me more soon. You guys will have to put up with me for seven weeks straight here within the next couple of weeks anyway. Also, I was serious about the no cuddles if you say a word about the party to the others.” You felt him nod against you before he pulled away from you and pulled you into a gentle kiss. The sad thing was, as soon as it started it ended. When he pulled away from you he gave your ass a light smack before practically running from you and to the boys. With a roll of your eyes and a smile you turned back toward the bike to put your helmet on and get everything situated to go to the meeting with your team.

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

Next Blurb (Coming Soon)

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return-of-the-queen-au · 22 hours ago

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Anyhow, once again on me looking through the same map that hasn't been changed since it released..time to give out some thoughts for them because I have nothing else to do

And also because I like to point out dumb things!

first thing first, this.

The manor, so you can also tell just how big their yard was, is completely isolated by thick ice. And the only form of "light" we have is that little hole I fell from.

weird! My guess? Vanessa's getting heartbroken caused an entire breakdown from her.. causing that whole ice mess.

Along with freezing a big chunk of her people, and bringing constant winter around her.

Which yeah..was already explained through the storybook of the subcon dwellers but yknow, going around the manor shows you just how big the impact was

the most morbid of all things in here is that we only see around..four? Five? Houses just before entering that entire ice tunnel to reach the manor.

It's best to assume the rest was all assimilated in the ice, ice spikes and snow since we kinda just...see that.

Shame.

but! On a lighter tone! I haveee been eyeing that manor, because I'm well aware of the various little modern things in there such as the microwave and the fridge but I always wondered what kind of style Vanessa enjoyed.

And seeing it..I might as well say it's gothic, or similar to that! Maybe a Victorian era gothic style manor.

Don't ya think?

anyhow..onto the next little details I enjoyed!

I lack photos mostly because Tumblr has a limit of 10, but I can always list where!

First of all, this

Right in the kitchen.

Next to it we can see a bloody chopper knife!

Also.. Vanessa has a really really big passion for wine and cookies. Oh, and the spilled wine glass next to the plate on our right on the kitchens table.

something else I've noticed is just how empty everything is, which is just something I found funny considering we're talking a queen's manor.

I wonder where Vanessa took the blood for the chopper and to write on the bathroom's mirror "my prince has gone!"

Speaking of the prince. The third floor.

yes scrapped but hey, still worth to check out.

nothings there, actually. Aside way too many tvs and obsessive writing and paper glueing on the walls. But from there we can assume that's where the prince's room is! Considering that ..big door all chained up.

just something I wanted to mention, onto the next thing!

This.

which is.. unique.

My best guess is that this was specifically a house belonging to either the prince before he became the prince, or another resident.

I do imagine something similar to this.

next! This.

Which brings me the question..what happened? We know that Vanessa didn't freeze the entire kingdom, or if she did, the ice has melted in the majority of the forest.

we know because the kingdom expands throughout the forest, it's a big place!

We see ruins of what used to be a prosperous kingdom all over the place.

But..what happened here?

If you're a believer that the fire ^ was snatcher's doing, like me, then we can imagine that he's responsible for another side of the kingdom.

which..brings out many possibilities. And opens a few ideas for my timeline, which I'm very happy for.

Also because of the bell it seems to be a church of some sort, or a bell tower that belongs to a church as they commonly belong there.

Last thing! while I was wandering, I saw a boat.

Which made me think.. could perhaps the swamp be a later effect?

What if the water, and then later the lake that seems to be the swamp got infected, corrupted, whatever you wanna think of it, and turned into the swamp we know?

we know there's hands in there waiting for their new victim, could it be just an effect from people getting rid of bodies? We know there's various places aside the graveyard with some tombstones, maybe some other solutions was getting rid of the bodies with the water? Or something similar to that.

Orrr could be related to the well being basically frozen. maybe the water stopped flowing throughout the water system that was in subcon and it lead to all the nasty things to gather in one place, which ended up creating the swamp.

Oh! And some subconites basically hanging themselves in the swamp. Fun, right?

#ahit #a hat in time #is this?? a theory #i guess?#also there's a big ass skull around. what's up with that #i reallllyyyyy need to start drawing how things used to look like . now I'm curious #subcon forest

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rahuratna · 21 hours ago

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Jelly 😭😭😭 The opening scene made me tear up. The way you described Nanami in his old age, captured all the essential facets of his personality, the care and love he shows, truly tugged at the heart. This is exactly the kind of partner he'd be if he grew older together with someone; devotion, undying and constant love, one that is never intrusive or demanding, a fire that truly never goes out.

The scene where he reads to her in the home, maintaining the necessary distance that a stranger would because she can't fully remember him 😭😭😭😭

Okay, I admit, I haven't watched The Notebook 🙈 But I do know the basics of the story, so I'm still able to appreciate the inspiration that you took from it, especially the difference in their financial circumstances.

I snorted when Naoya made an appearance. Truly fit for the role of a privileged jackass, lollll.

Also, Nanami as a woodworker's apprentice seems so fitting with his character, somehow. We see him in canon in all of these professions that suck the soul out of him, and it's really nice to see him in a good, fulfilling profession, one that allows him to save for whatever he chooses in the future (I think not knowing the Notebook full story benefits me here, because I honestly don't know what's coming, lol).

Also, the scene on the beach when he says "If you're a bird, I'm a bird." 😭😭😭🧡🧡🧡🧡

There's so much depth and substance to your descriptions and the way you capture the young, but earnest love they are both capable of. It's also evident in the scene where they get physically intimate in the truck. His appreciation for her goes beyond just sexual, even though it is very charged.

He sees her as someone truly beautiful to him, in every way possible, which is so effectively conveyed with how you wrote that scene. You captured the perfect balance of clumsy, passionate, tender and exploratory, all the hiccups of a first love, the way it can lift you on a wave and deposit you to the depths of despair when things don't work out.

The last scene didn't surprise me, considering who her parents are (wow, Mom needs a slap with a cast iron pan) but I'm very excited to see how their relationship pans out and your future installments of this. I know it's going to hit me very, very hard in the emotions 😭🥺🧡🧡

𝒊𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒂 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒅, 𝒊'𝒎 𝒂 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒅 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 1 🦢𓍼ོ 𑜞᭄ೃ

𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒊 𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒌 𝒅𝒂𝒚 3 ~ 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒅𝒂𝒚, 𝒌𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒐. ♥︎

🦢nanami kento x fem!reader

🦢 synopsis: in the present day, elderly kento nanami reads you the story of your love, in the hopes that you'll remember him.

🦢 part 1 of 3. part 2 is 7.8k words and will be posted on 7/7. 💕

🦢 part 1 | part 2 | part 3

🦢word count: 7.9k

🦢cw: minors dni, smut (p in v, awkward virginity loss, fingering, cum, creampie, infidelity, condom use, makeout), entirely based and inspired on the film adaptation of The Notebook by author Nicholas Sparks, all credit to the original owners, fluff, angst, grief, war, character deaths, aging, memory loss, scarred!nanami kento, jjk spoilers possibly, non curse au, pining, breakup

🦢a/n: my nanami week day 3 entry for the big day.🥳🎂🎁🎈

happy birthday, kento darling. love you in every lifetime. 💕 sparkle dividers by @/anitalenia. swan dividers by @/fairytopea.

By all accounts, I am an ordinary man.

I've lived an honest life, worked in a respectable profession. I saved enough money to retire. I've passed by with minimal regrets. My legacy has been about as exceptional as anyone else's.

In another respect, I have had the privilege of knowing what it means to love another with all my heart and soul.

Because of this I can say: I have done more than enough.

----

His navy button down hangs on the right side of the closet where it always did, beige dress pants folded neatly on the dresser where a pair of glasses and a watch lay on top to be applied in chronological order. It was tidy in a way that would suggest routine in its owner that was rarely deviated from.

It's how he's always been, and how he always will be until the last breath leaves his lungs.

A spotted necktie used to adorn his neck, though he hadn't worn it in some time due to the arthritis in his fingers.

Someone else used to tie it for him, although an instance like that had occurred long since before the last time he wore it.

Kento looks back at himself in the mirror as he runs both hands through the sides of his hair, using his water stained fingers to tuck away any unruly strands, save for the faint cowlick on the back left of his head due to the faded scarring from years past that never truly goes away no matter how much he tames it.

He had never been self conscious per se, aside from the scars, although he always took pride in his appearance and became keenly aware of his symptoms brought upon him by aging.

He did his best to ignore them. He knew his time was better spent than worrying about anything superficial. But, it was always instinctual for him to notice and upkeep how he looked, as it was something engraved in him by his parents.

His skin is wrinkled, crows feet around his kind, singular amber eye and the socket where the left one used to reside, now covered by an eyepatch. The worry lines of his forehead are more pronounced that convey the years of memories and experiences behind them.

His figure is soft with a more pronounced belly, a sign of a well enjoyed life with evidence of comfort from indulging in a loved one's regular home-cooked meals.

Still, his trusty dress shirt fits snugly across his shoulders all the same, slightly hunched now, an ember in his eye that never dulled that portrayed that hidden charm of his he possessed to anyone lucky enough to observe eventually past his initial reservedness.

Despite the changes, his beauty never budged. It merely shifted gracefully with the passage of time, even more so when he selectively spoke.

He spent more of his time nowadays thinking than speaking. Wisdom and perceptiveness had always been characteristic of the thoughts that came out of his mouth, but even more so now with more years behind him than the remaining ones that awaited him.

Kento walks intentionally down a well lit hallway, his brown polished dress shoes faintly echo with each step, a worn book in his right hand.

His destination is uncertain to anyone walking past, but it becomes more apparent as he stops to wait in line at a desk with a line of other older men like himself to receive his medication, before he crosses into a new corridor, the sunlight showcasing the illumination of the fine metal wrapped around the ring finger of his left fist.

"Morning." A few fellow residents nod to him, and he nods back in polite acknowledgement.

"Good morning."

"I keep trying to die but they won't let me." A more jovial passerby jokes.

Kento's lips press together with amusement, though not stopping his pace. "You can't have everything, I suppose."

He pauses outside of a door, smoothing over the non-existent wrinkles on his stomach before he knocks carefully, a kind nurse in white answers with a smile.

"Good morning, Mr. Nanami."

-----

The light on the pond becomes less dull as the sun starts to breach the horizon, the sound of cicadas persist even beyond the pale blue walls of your room.

These days you don't get much sleep, but sitting by the window lately brings you more solace than laying in bed. The swans and geese in particular are enjoyable to watch, little trickles of water spraying off their feathers as they groom themselves and crane their necks with distant honks, little fluff balls of their babies in a row, paddling close behind.

You try and count each one, before a voice rudely interrupts your train of thought.

"Ma'am? You have someone here to see you."

Your frustration is quickly forgotten as two people enter the room. The one on the left you can't place, although it seems to be different people in the same colored robes. Usually they come with a message of sorts or have some sort of task for you to do. They're all quite a nuisance but that consistency about them at least makes it easier to identify.

"This is Mr. Nanami. He's come to read to you."

"What? Reading?"

"Mhmm." The nurse nods with a smile.

Kento waits patiently next to her, his head lowered slightly out of respect to not meet your gaze so directly. He acknowledges you with a polite nod after her introduction.

There's something unsettling about this mystery man. You don't know why, but the thought of being forced to sit next to him while he drones on endlessly sounds insufferable. He's suspiciously neat and well groomed. Why should you allow yourself to be around him, alone?

"Um, I don't know." You answer curtly, smoothing your skirt, pausing to pick at a frayed thread.

"Come now, you'll like him, he's a very good storyteller." The nurse coaxes with a saccharine tone.

He still doesn't move, just waits patiently in the silence for as long as you need to make your decision. The suspicion isn't lifted from you entirely just yet, but his quiet nature makes him a bit more approachable.

Finally, you nod and walk towards him, reluctantly taking his arm that he offers you and not letting the nurse out of your sight until you're well down the hallway.

----

The sunroom is well lit. Humidity and sunshine leak in from the window screens, bestowing a calming view of the retirement home gardens with shrubbery surrounding all sides. A few other residents are sitting in chairs outside, some read, some stroll, partaking in various activities underneath the pleasant weather.

The beach sat further down the horizon, cycling in seaside salt with the subtle gust of wind that would blow occasionally.

He pulls out a chair at the white iron table, allowing you to sit down comfortably before he concerns himself with his own seating arrangement, grunting as he sits down.

"Where were we?" He uses the tip of his middle finger to adjust his lenses, opening up the pages of the worn book he was carrying.

"Ah. I remember." He utters, tracing his finger along the print until he lands at the spot he was looking for.

"We had just begun the first chapter. It was the night they met, at the fair. Kento was there that night with his friend, Yu."

You quirk a brow.

Kento.

His name sounded foreign to you, but something about this setting rings a bell to a tune you might have heard before.

Kento summarizes over the spine of the open book. "They met in Kuantan in the middle of June before they were going to start university in the fall. Both young adults with no inkling of just how life changing that first night would be."

----

More than 60 years earlier.

Kuantan.

If you could live there year round, you would. The atmosphere of the seaside and all the scents and sights that gripped you with nostalgia for summers gone by immersed you all at once as your car rolled onto the gravel of your family's summer home.

The humidity carried promise and freedom, something in the air that was as intoxicating and romantic as it was fleeting. You were at an age where you were practically jumping at the opportunity for independence, a future at a pristine university with a promising road to success neatly and carefully laid out for you by your watchful parents who were still trying their hardest to keep you under their thumbs.

The marble floors resounded under your heels as you crossed the threshold, breathing in and reuniting with its fond scent while your parents' household staff quickly sorted and tended to your belongings.

You hummed contentedly as you built up the anticipation in your mind for the evening to come as you changed your outfit and got cleaned up.

You had planned an evening outing to the local fair with your very best friend who had also come to stay for the summer, along with her new boyfriend.

"We're expecting you home before midnight." Your mother said as more of a scold than a statement.

You rolled your eyes as you walked out the door and into the summer air, where their crushing expectations couldn't control you at least for a few hours.

----

The smell of smoke was rich with barbecued meats, and deep fried goodies fresh and piping hot from the hands of street vendors. A bell resounded and distant screams of delight could be heard from attendees indulging in the thrills and sights the festivities offered them.

Kento scanned the scene around him, recognizing well that it was one that wasn't meant for him, but he came anyway with lots of assurance, encouragement, or perhaps pressure with a side of guilt from his conversely outgoing best friend, Yu Haibara.

"Dammit!" Yu grunted in frustration as the metal ball rolled up the staff of the carnival game, just missing the bell, but accepting his mild defeat as he walked away with a small stuffed bunny as a consolation prize.

"Well, there's something!" He tosses it and catches it in midair as he and Kento make their way back towards the bumper cars where they left Yu's girlfriend to meet up with some unknown group of friends.

He and Haibara come to a stop, leaning on the railings as they watch the ongoing round of bumper cars, searching the sea of bobbing and clashing metal in the arena for your best friend.

"Hi, honey!" Yu beams as he holds up his winning prize to his sweetheart. "I won ya a little something!"

"Ahhh thank youuuu baby!" Your best friend giggles shrilly back to him, snorting as she gets abruptly t-boned in the side.

That's when Kento notices you, in the offending purple buggy. Your head is thrown back upon the impact, hibiscus in your hair, and lovely lips falling open in an eye catching smile.

The sound that pours out of your throat is hearty and melodious that makes you double over slightly under the weight of its merriment. It's contagious. It has a very notable effect on him that he can't place in this exact moment as it happens.

"What's her name?" The question mumbles past his lips uncontrollably.

Yu gives him a smile and nods in your direction, giving him your name.

Now, Kento simply didn't ask about strangers, much less girls that Yu brought around. Based on what he knows of his trusted friend, the person would have to be pretty damn special for him to raise such a rare inquiry.

"She's here on summer vacation. Father's retired military and works in finance. He's got more money than God."

He watches you drive away as you're still enthralled in the experience, throwing your head back.

You radiate absolution to him. Your eyes look like possibility and freedom wrapped into one. Your daring concentration as you maneuvered your buggy was playful. The desire to know the mechanisms behind it were slowly pulling at his heartstrings, leaving his hands clammy. It's unlike any reaction he's experienced when clapping eyes on a stranger in a sea of nameless faces.

But to him, yours was begging to be uttered.

He knows far better than to imagine that you'd ever give someone like him the time of day.

-----

You're in a fit of laughter when you exit the ride, arm in arm with your best friend with an entourage behind you.

Your best friend is quickly swept up into her boyfriend's arms, Yu. You throw Yu a smile, pausing to let the lovebirds reunite and so he can present her with her consolation prize.

That's when you notice him.

He's tall, and a little gangly. His long blond bangs fall a little bit in his eyes from where they were messily tucked behind his ear as he moves his head. You're startled to discover a pair of very warm, very tender brown eyes, not the color you'd expect in someone with hair as golden as his, underneath dark expressive brows that furrow with a stoicism at first that you would not expect in someone his age.

He has a long slender nose and thin, pretty pink lips. But the most notable thing about him is his predisposition. He's quiet, humble. He doesn't speak up, and he appears to be out of place. You can tell he's uncomfortable in this kind of setting.

You want to know his name, you want to hear his voice.

"Have we met?" You ask him.

That voice of yours he traced in the melody of your laugh moments ago startles him when he hears it plainly for the first time. Especially now that he knows your name, and you don't know his.

You're stunning up close, eyes framed by long lashes in a doe-ish expression that seemed all but natural to you. The glow catches his cheeks off guard in a healthy shade of pink.

"Uhm, n-no, we haven't." He clears his throat.

You give him your name and he gives you his hand. He pulls away rather hastily, cheeks now graduated to a deep red when he realizes the sweaty handshake he just subjected you to.

You notice, but you pretend not to. If anything the interaction just made him appear more human, more real.

"Kento Nanami."

"Kento." You repeat. "Do you live around here?"

"Not until recently." He clears his throat. "I'm working this summer until I can attend school in the city.

"Really, what do you do?"

"Um." He blushes and looks down.

It wasn't that he was ashamed of his job, but it certainly wasn't one that was helpful when it came to impressing a woman of your caliber who belonged with someone who was older, more established perhaps, and with certainly more wealth than he could provide, which was only enough for himself.

"I'm a wood worker's apprentice." He admitted sheepishly.

"Really? I find that fascinating." You lean on your hip. "I've always been impressed with craftsmanship."

He smiles and blushes. "Well, my grandfather was good at it. I had a knack for making things when I was younger. It gives me a good start."

"There you are."

A new voice interrupts and the owner slips his arm around your shoulder, pulling you a little closer into his chest with a slightly possessive air that doesn't go unnoticed. Kento snaps his head looking at the guy next to you.

"Was looking all over for ya. He's not bothering you is he?" Naoya jests in your direction.

Kento turns red, lowering his face, both in shame and simmering in anger he doesn't wish to show.

He knew Naoya looked down on him. He was educated, smart, rich. A certainly more engaging prospect for a girl like you in just about every way.

"No, not at all." You answer confidently, giving Naoya a stern look.

Naoya is a little thrown off by this. Surely you wouldn't want to be stuck talking to someone like Kento when he was right there?

Naoya clears his throat and tries to shift the conversation.

"Well I promised you a funnel cake, didn't I, doll?"

You flinch a little at the nickname, dissuaded by Naoya's persistence, but decide you don't want to cause a scene.

"Sure, why not?"

"Fantastic." He flashes a flawless smile at you and then at Kento a little more condescending. "If you'll excuse us."

"Not at all." Kento mumbles, shuffling out of the way, face shooting bright red again when Naoya subtly bumps his shoulder on the way past, looking longingly in your direction as he let yet another opportunity sail him by.

---

You can feel Kento watching you two the entire time. He definitely doesn't make things subtle from where he's sitting with Haibara and his girlfriend.

You and Naoya are sharing a funnel cake, and you're doing your best to pretend like you're listening to everything he's saying, your face burning underneath Kento's longing gaze from the other side, tucking some hair behind your ear as you try to be normal, distracting yourself with the piping hot taste of the pastry with powdered sugar and strawberry syrup.

Kento decides to get up to see you himself, walking towards your table blindly before his actions can catch up to his brain, running purely on this courage that seemed to come out of nowhere, along with many other things changing inside him in a way that didn't make any sense ever since he heard your name.

He walks and as he passes, almost trips on Naoya's foot.

"Do you mind?" Naoya hisses in contempt. He stands up. Kento is tomato red but he doesn't back down to Naoya.

"Naoya!" You chastise him as you stand up, walking in front and shielding Kento from Naoya getting in his face.

"C'mon, let's get out of here." You turn, murmuring to Kento, taking him by the hand.

Kento does his best to resist the urge to smile and breaks out in red once more as you lead him away.

Yu and your best friend watch you both with knowing grins, leaving Naoya fuming in the dust.

---

The sunset has now subsided.

You're in a corner of the outskirts of the fair that's more quiet and removed from the rest. You walk further down until coarse sand begins to squish underneath the soles of your feet. You both laugh as you try and trudge through, but give up and take off your shoes, holding them in your hands as you walk side by side on the beach.

"I'm sorry for what happened back there." You apologize to him.

"Not at all." Kento shakes his head. "It was my fault for tripping next to him." He laughs and then lets the silence mull over for a moment. "...What do you see in him, if I may ask?"

"He's just a friend." You answer. "More of an acquaintance. Our dads went to military school together."

"Oh, I see." Kento nods, trying to act like relief wasn't absolutely flooding his entire body in this moment. "So, what are your parents like, and your family?"

"Well, they've always been pretty strict." You sigh as you reflect. "Every morning I wake up at 7 am. I have tennis lessons, then piano lessons. French tutor, Spanish tutor, English. Math. Science. Then I have lunch, more studies. Dinner. Then I have quiet time with my family. And...before bed I try to catch up on some reading if I can."

Kento looks surprised at the extensive list. "That's quite a regimen. Are you attending university?"

"I have a few applications I've submitted. Just waiting for replies." You hum, fiddling with the straps of your sandals in your hands as you stumble.

Kento can't help but notice a little bit of dullness in your words compared to the spark you had earlier. There's something deeper going on behind all your studies, all this pressure he suspects you must be under.

"Is there anything... you like to do just for yourself?" Kento asks.

You stop, looking out at the waves, the indigo sky hanging above as you pondered something nobody had ever asked you before.

"Um..I write."

"You write? Really?" Kento looks at you, a little surprised by your answer.

"Yeah. Little stories, poems, and the like."

"Can I ask what about?" He inquires as you two begin strolling slowly side by side again.

"Mostly romance." You stifle a laugh, a bit embarrassed, but also a bit surprised at how quickly you felt yourself peeling back these layers, speaking out loud about things not even the closest people in your life knew about with someone who was a complete stranger just an hour ago.

"Heh, you know, that doesn't surprise me too much." Kento tucks a strand of blond behind his ear, a little warmth he can't help but feel as you revealed this unknown part of you.

"What's that supposed to mean?" You smile.

"Nothing bad, just makes the most sense. My mother is a writer, too. She also writes romance."

"No way? That's so neat." You marvel at him.

"But what about you?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, you. Tell me about your parents, and what you like to do with your free time."

"Um, well." Kento hesitates, but figures he'd better be honest.

It couldn't be all that bad if you had elected to spend your evening walking next to him on this deserted beach instead of with someone more suited to you like Naoya Zenin.

"You know, I'm not sure what I like to do. I haven't had free time in a while...but my parents..I haven't spoken to them in a few months. I graduated early and wanted independence, and so I moved out here." He nods and gestures to the town.

You nod slowly, listening to every word.

"My father was always kind of hard on me." He admits. "He's a good man, don't get me wrong. I suppose we've always just seen things differently despite how alike we are."

"What about your mother? Are you close with her?"

"Very close." He nods. "But she understands I wanted to do things on my own and needed my space from my father."

"What does he do?"

"He works in finance."

"So your mother's a writer and your father's a banker. What are you going into?"

Kento blushes. "Finance."

"Huh, the irony."

"Yeah, that's if I can save enough to afford tuition though." Kento points out.

"Well, I have faith in you."

"Thank you."

You both stare at one another, having run out of things to talk about.

"Well..."

"Well?"

After a minute, Kento chuckles, turning away.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing I just. Heh, just thinking."

"About what?" You quirk a brow.

"Just ironic how you ended up talking to someone like me. You've got your whole life ahead of you and I'm just a nobody."

"You're not nobody, Kento. You're somebody to me. You're a hell of a lot more kind, more down to earth and wise than half of the guys I've met. And I mean that wholeheartedly."

Kento blushes. "Thank you."

The silence simmers between you even more, then you get an idea.

"One sec."

You turn and walk a ways down the beach. You look around, and when you're reassured nobody else is there, you lay down, close to the water so that the waves barely kiss the area below your feet.

"What are you doing?" He asks, walking closer.

You're sprawled out, a smile on your face, staring up at the stars.

"Back when I was little, my parents and I would come out here to the beach. Just lay by the waves and look at the stars. Sometimes fall asleep."

"The tide is coming in." Kento looks on nervously. "Will you get up?"

"That's your problem." You hum, closing your eyes for a moment. "You don't do things for yourself, then you wonder why you can't figure out what makes you happy."

Touché.

Kento looks both ways as though he needs permission. Who was he kidding?

"Fine."

You feel the ground shift as Kento lays next to you in the sand, the warmth from his body achingly close.

You couldn't help but wish for more of it from where you laid but you stayed perfectly still.

Kento closes his eyes too, filling his senses with nothing but the pull and gentle recede of the waves, the mist of sea salt, the droning from the fair that were all but distant at this point, the rise and fall of your chest next to his more obvious, the simple sensation of laying on the beach is suddenly a very relaxing one.

One he had not realized until he had the courage to do it with you.

"Reading." He murmurs.

"Mm?"

"You asked me what I like to do for me...and I love to read." He says softly, turning his face towards the sound of your voice.

"Like what, Kento?"

"Literature...the classics. Just, stories that make you think."

Suddenly, the waves get quiet and you sit up, noticing they've receded far from the shore.

"Oh shit!!"

Kento's eyes snap open, sitting up as you both scramble to stand in a frenzy and hold onto each other, screaming as a huge wave surges towards the beach at blinding speed.

"AHHHH!" You scream as it completely obliterates both of you, soaking your clothes and making you both fall flat on your stomachs.

The ocean falls back.

Kento coughs and sputters, clearing the sting of salt from his eyes and nostrils. You chuckle, slowly then fall into a pit of hysterical, ugly laughter, holding your sides like they were about to split open.

"What...pfffbbbttt....what's so funny?" Kento asks, scowling as he tries to clear his ear of salt water.

You continue howling like a hyena, the sound disharmonic but hearty and...oddly endearing. You squeezed your knees together to not piss yourself from all the laughter.

"Why are you laughing?" Kento scoffs, unable to stay immune to the contagion of your merriment.

"Oh...that was...that was fun, heh heh..." You breathe out, getting a grip.

Both of you are soaked from head to toe, your flowing skirt clinging to your figure, hair kissed with salt from the sea reducing it to its natural texture with the hibiscus blossom still intact by your right ear, skin shining with the dusky aura of the quickly fading sunset.

You were such a vision that it inspires Kento to ask a question that was unlike him.

"Will you dance with me?" He offers you his hand.

"Sure." You answer with a grin, taking his outstretched fingers.

His grip is graceful, the kind of firmness that relaxes when he's handling something delicate. You warm at the thought of him exercising such care when it comes to you.

He pulls you into his chest, simply swaying with you on the beach to a non-existent melody, wet clothes and all.

"We don't have any music." You whisper, gazing up into those puppy brown eyes, soft and meek in expression but anything but mild in their depth.

He begins to hum, softly, somewhat poorly, but the low pitch of his voice carries a melody that could be improved if he worked on it.

"You're a horrible singer." You chuckle with a smile, before it slowly fades as he pulls you even closer, laying your head on his shoulder.

"But I do love this song..."

"I'll be seeing you

In all the old familiar places

That this heart of mine embraces

All day through

In that small cafe

The park across the way

The children's carousel

The chestnut trees

The wishing well

I'll be seeing you

In every lovely summer's day

In everything that's light and gay

I'll always think of you that way..."

-----

Present Day

"Summer romances start for one reason or another. But Kento found himself portraying a remarkable imagining of a young man falling head over heels for a girl who came from a world different than him. They were both speeding headfirst down a path that they had no business of traveling with no regard for the consequences."

"They fell in love, didn't they?" You interrupt with a smile on your face as Kento reads to you, scooting your chair just a little closer.

Kento peers over the pages, reading spectacles perched on the bridge of his nose, holding back a smile as you slowly began to pick up on the premise of the story. "Yes. They did."

"Good. I love these kinds of stories. Go on."

-----

The summer days were long and the months were short. Every afternoon and evening belonged to him.

Every moment you could sneak away from your studies, you were riding your bicycle as fast as you could down the dirt beaten path to the lumber yard where he worked, following the smell of smoke and freshly chopped palms.

Kento gave you that humble smile, his heart soaring in his chest as he saw you ditch your bike, practically sprinting at him full speed into his arms to attack him with kisses, a bit of pride swelling in his belly as all his fellow lumbermen wondered how in the hell the quiet lanky kid from Tokyo managed to win the heart of someone like you.

Your favorites were riding on the handles of his bike, his cheek pressed against yours as you balanced near the basket, speeding down the road with your friends to the beach where you'd swim and lose track of time on the boardwalk for hours, sharing shaved ice and savory treats from food trucks with what cash Kento had in his pocket from a days work.

Other days you spent galavanting through the city streets with a pair of earbuds listening to Sleeping with Sirens, wandering into ice cream shops and kissing the melted vanilla off his nose until he pulled you into the alley for more kisses.

----

It was an overcast day that promised rain with all the building clouds around the desolate beach. The foamy waves beat against the rocks and a cluster of seagulls scatter as you bolt towards them, swimsuit coverup floating away in the breeze with your hibiscus in your hair as you splash in the water.

"WOOOOOO! Ken, come on!"

Kento walks bashfully behind you with pink cheeks with both your shoes in his hands, pants rolled up to his ankles. Normally he'd be self conscious of his surroundings but he learned quickly after dating you to get used to it.

It was a beautiful sight, seeing you so open, so free from worry with blissful elation in the water that he couldn't help but succumb to your warmth that made him feel safe. Even more so since he felt honored that he could be the one to provide that space for you.

"Do you think I could be a bird in another life, Kento?" You ask as you twirl around, grinning mischievously as you pranced through the water.

Kento tries to ignore the way the fabric clung to your thighs, the way just a dash of wind in your hair made him feel even younger than he already was, like he could be a little boy back on the playground with a flower for you behind his back, giving up the cookie his mother packed in his lunch just to see you smile, and feeling his heart skip at the moment you arrived every morning at the bus stop.

"What do you mean?" He manages to ask.

"Reincarnation, Ken. We could be two birds."

He quirks a brow at the comment. "Let me guess, you'd want me to build us a little nest made out of sticks in a tree?"

"Exactly! I'd be the momma bird, you'd be the daddy bird."

Kento shakes his head despite the stubborn affection afflicting him, watching you spin around, making cawing noises. You were taking being a bird quite seriously.

"Say I'm a bird, Ken."

"No."

"Say I'm a bird." You repeat, this time as a playful threat as you lower your head, getting ready to pounce on him.

"No I'm not going to—"

Kento's eyes almost bug out of his head as you wind up and run at him, shoes falling out of his hands as you jump into his arms.

"GAHHHH say it, Ken!"

Kento scoffs and stumbles a little backwards, holding you tightly in his grasp, his shirt and pants now more wet than he intended but if it was by your doing he'd always accept it, eyes melting like caramels when they meet the teasing fire of yours.

"You're a bird." He murmurs.

You lean in and kiss him.

"Now say you're a bird, too, Kento."

Your words affect him like rays of sun through a leaked window to his heart he realizes he's never going to close.

"If you're a bird, then I'm a bird." He whispers before he closes the distance between your lips again.

-----

There was nothing quite like summer nights, laughter, chatter, and good company on the porch at Yu's and Kento's shared duplex. You'd sit in Kento's lap, watching Yu and his friends tear up the dance floor, drinking beers and whispering secrets only between the two of you.

And when the tension had been brewing like a pressure cooker, it all came bursting to a steamy head in the fogged windows of Kento's small delivery truck, grinding on top of him as you made out like it would be the last time you ever would.

One night, he parks a ways down at the end of the street and turns off his lights before you both nearly sprang on top of each other.

You moan and sigh as he shifts you in his lap, massaging your damp folds through your panties with his thigh in just that spot you like.

It didn't help that he got better at it every time you indulged. His lips got more adventurous, his groans a little more desperate. He studied you, that much was quite clear as you helped yourself to more friction from his leg, before he couldn't stand to watch you anymore and his lips were back on yours.

"Mmm, Ken, fuck. I gotta go..."

"No..." He murmurs as he nuzzles into your pulse.

"Haah, Kento, mphhh, please."

"Just a little longer." He groans into your neck, before he licks down to your collar, making your spine arch.

"Ahhh..."

Both of you were virgins at this point, but as things got closer and the makeouts got deeper, you couldn't help but daydream about having sex with him.

It was something you were quite nervous for, given all(or the lack of) useful education from your parents on the topic. And what little information they did teach you was laced in fear and complete avoidance.

But God, right now...you can't really focus on that as his hands slide up and down the soft skin of your stomach, just grazing the underside of your breasts.

God, you want more. You want to feel him, want to hear him lose himself in what you've both been slowly aching towards with every taste you got of one another.

You feel like you're at a point that you can trust him, that he could be your very first to safely explore this with.

"Ken?"

"Mhmm?" He moans from his place against your throat. "Yeah?"

"Give me your fingers."

He feels himself grow achingly hard in his pants. Did he hear you say what he thinks you just said?

"Wait, really?"

"I trust you, Kento. I really do. Just please, please?" You kiss his cheeks as you roll your hips impatiently against his bulge. "I want to try letting you finger me just a little, just to see if I like it."

"Babe, I-"

"I trust you."

"Fuck, I...I don't wanna hurt you..."

"You won't, baby..." You whisper as your lips nibble at his ear. "I'm too wet."

"Fuck..." Kento groans, shifting you in his lap as his hand disappears up your skirt, looking into your eyes with lust blown pupils in the dark of the truck.

Without thinking, he hooks around the lace gusset with his thumb, gently pulling it through the web of slick to the side, his thumb barely skimming your folds.

"Just aah, just tell me to stop if you want me to, okay?" He whispers.

You arch responsively, keeping your eyes locked on him as one of his fingers finds and teases the liquid silk dripping out of your entrance, before slowly sinking in to the first knuckle, his mouth falling open in mirrored response.

He's never done anything like this before, never felt a girl so close like this. He knows only the things he's heard from his friends, and that it's a very sensitive part of your body. He doesn't go any further, waiting patiently for your reaction, trying to put off the ache in his pants so he can savor and learn from this moment.

"Oh-" the corners of your eyes pinch at the small intrusion.

Shit. Kento thinks quickly. He knows your breasts are really sensitive. He leans in slowly wraps his lips around your nipple and he softly wiggles it back and forth with his tongue.

"I-is this okay?"

"Mhm..slower, softer.."

"Okay..." He groans as he feels the smooth muscles flutter and squeeze around his finger as he relaxes, slowly pulling out, and pushing back inside your pussy only to that first knuckle at an achingly slow pace.

God, you're tight. But so...pliant. He slides in and out of you like silk, the honey coating him like syrup, watching you breathe softly and exhale on top of him...

"You're so beautiful." He murmurs. "You're so pretty like this..."

"Kento..." You sink your nails into the fabric of his seats as he withdraws his finger, hand gliding through slick as he swirls it up, until he finds the soft nub, circling it until you jerk in his lap.

"Sorry." He whispers.

"No, no. Keep going baby... just haah...really sensitive."

He moves his finger, just to the left to tease around your clit, only softly nudging it with each wet rotation of his fingertips. "Like this?" He breathes.

"Yeah, like that..." You whisper.

It feels so warm down there, so wet like the feeling is trickling up your spine in a delicious way, beginning to stoke a calming flame at the base until you begin to slowly undulate against him.

"I'm doing it right?"

"Yes...you are, Kento."

"Should I...fuck, you sure you want me to keep going?" He breathes, his eyelashes almost brushing against your cheek as he holds you close.

"Mhm...I'm sure Kento..." You reply softly, closing your eyes.

"God, you..." He chuckles weakly. "You're really killing me here." He gazes up at you in his lap.

"You're so pretty like this, really."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah...fuck you're just...I like seeing how...aroused you get. If that's not weird to say."

"Haha, no, no baby. Not weird at all."

"You're mine..." He murmurs, kissing your collar as he curls his finger a little bit faster.

"Kento, I'm..." Your jaw falls open.

"Yeah?"

"It's so much, baby..."

"It's okay..it's okay...just let yourself feel good."

"Ohh...Ken, I...think I'm gonna cum..."

"Fuck, r-really?"

"Y-yeah just don't stop..."

He continues coaxing and rubbing you with his finger, working you towards your orgasm, wincing as he felt the throb coming from the raging tent in his pants as his boxers began to drip with precum.

The sensation is almost too much, especially hearing you moan like this, knowing he's responsible, an overwhelming sensation of possessiveness washing over him as you cry his name until...

"Shit!" A torrent of cum surges from his tip, dribbling and coating his boxers.

"Fu-aaah! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...." Kento groans as his climax seized him by force, paralyzing him in his movements as he completely empties himself just from witnessing your arousal.

You moan too, half disappointed at the loss but quickly entranced by the beautiful expression on Kento's face as you watch him cum for the first time in front of you.

His blonde bangs are messy, slightly sticky with the lovely sheen of sweat and heat of pink he wears on his cheeks, thin lips parted in a completely numbed out expression as it surges through him like a wave, the intimate gravity of aftershocks somehow pulling you even closer together in this tender moment, his soft pants and your hushed breaths barely overpowering the evening sonnet of cicadas.

"I'm so sorry..." He apologizes, shifting so you're not laying so directly over the pooling cum in his pants as the dampness seeped through.

"God I'm so..." His cheeks flush from pink to red. "I wanted to make you cum...I'm so sorry."

"Hey, Hey, Ken..."

He slowly relaxes as you numb him with a long kiss, holding it as you let the quiet rush back over the closed space, slowly opening your mouth against his, glossing your tongue back and forth across his lips before you release it with a delicate suck.

"It's okay. It's okay, baby."

"I can still make you...if you want..."

You sigh delicately and the soft noise makes him throb in his pants.

"I want to..." You turn nervously, looking at the porch light in the distance between the trees. "Oh shit, I think my dad's still awake."

"Oh." Kento's face goes from red to white. You both move around frantically, trying to straighten up.

"Fuck." Kento curses, turning red again when he realizes the huge cum stain leaking through his pants. "I'm supposed to walk you up there."

"No, no. Hey. Don't worry about it." You lean in and kiss him hard as you slip out of his truck. "I'm just gonna sneak in and hopefully he's not still awake."

"But-"

"See ya tomorrow!"

You run and slam the truck door closed before he can protest, sprinting down the dirt path, turning to look back and catch him before he drives away.

"Young lady."

"AHHH!" You scream and nearly run into the door as your dad sits on the porch, dead panned expression that you honestly can't make out to be upset, annoyance, worry, or all three. He holds a smoke in his hand that indicates he had been out there for a while.

While you were a grown adult, you still tiptoed around your parents for as long as they could wield the "under our roof" card over your head.

"Getting awfully close with that boy, aren't you?" He asks, bringing the smoke to his lips.

You pause, unsure if he was implying that he witnessed the whole steamy fiasco unfold inside Kento's truck down the road.

No, there was no way.

"Y-yeah."

"Hm." A thin plume of smoke pours from his nostrils. "Bring him to the house tomorrow for lunch. I want to meet this young man."

You nod. "O-okay." You walk up to him, giving him a goodnight kiss and hug, hoping that your neck didn't have obvious marks on it or you reeked too much of Kento's scent.

"Night, dad." You mumble sheepishly as you close the front door.

Your father wasn't born yesterday. He didn't need to see a damn thing to know what sort of shenanigans you and Kento were getting up to. You could have your summer fun, fine. But a young man who couldn't be bothered to come to the door? Who takes up all your spare time from your studies knowing what important opportunities you needed to prepare for?

He doesn't like how this is going, not one bit.

As you enter the house, he shakes his head with a displeased chuckle, knowing this isn't going to end well. "Oh boy."

------

Hearty laughs echo around the table from rich men as you and Kento look at one another, not grasping the punchline.

It was lunchtime, and your parents threw an afternoon gathering with a bunch of names you never heard of in attendance of your father's associates from both the military and finance sectors alike.

The guest list reeked of old money.

Kento clears his throat and takes a long sip of water. He felt impolite and out of place imbibing in any of the alcohol, even though he sure could use it right now.

While he was no stranger to the posh side of society with having a father who worked in finance, he realizes he's a fish out of water more than ever with the more questions that your father's friends ask him, making him keenly aware of his position of just starting out.

"What is it you do for work again?"

"I work at the lumber yard as a wood worker's apprentice and hope to go back to university this fall, sir."

"Mhm and if you don't mind my asking, how much do you make?"

"About 30 ringgits per hour."

The table goes quiet, and the air thickens into something extremely uncomfortable.

"It's... it's not a lot, but it gives me what I need to get by until I can start." Kento says modestly, though the confidence fades from his voice and he lowers his head as the expression of disappointment on your parents' faces doesn't budge.

"Well I think that's lovely, dear." A random woman pipes in from the table.

"Thank you." Kento says, trying not to exhale with too much relief.

The table awkwardly resumes conversations with one another again, and then your mom pipes up, turning to Kento.

"So, you two have been spending a lot of time together. Must be real fond of each other."

"Yes ma'am." Kento admits timidly, breaking into a smile when you make eye contact with him, gently nudging his shoulder with your own.

"Well, with summer ending in a couple weeks, what will you two do?" Your mother asks in that honeyed tone, the one you recognize has a little bit of malice baked into it.

You pause as the anger simmers little by little.

"The university I'm planning to attend should only be a couple of hours away." Kento answers in what he hopes is a polite tone, dabbing his mouth with a napkin.

"But we're going back to Tokyo." Your mother retorts. "Didn't she tell you?"

You set down your fork, leaning back in your seat as you stare at your mother who pulls her face into that insincere smile where she acts like she's done nothing wrong.

Kento pauses. The words sit like a heavy weight in his stomach. "No, she hasn't."

"I was going to tell you, Kento." You murmur to him, squeezing his hand under the table.

"We can talk about it later." He murmurs back, squeezing your hand with reassurance.

"University of Tokyo, by the way." Your mom piles on again, driving the wedge even deeper.

You stare straight ahead. Kento looks at you, defeated as the news sprung cracks into his heart little by little until he was sinking.

Your mother seems more than pleased with this reaction and starts up a conversation with someone else, while you and Kento sit there and wish you could rewind time back to five minutes earlier when it didn't seem like the stars had placed you two even further apart than you already were.

Part 2 will be posted on 7/7 🦢💕 thank you for reading. 💕

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